1 00:00:28,333 --> 00:00:30,787 - [Man] That's a really lovely watch. 2 00:00:30,787 --> 00:00:31,787 - Thank you. 3 00:00:33,307 --> 00:00:35,413 I got it as a birthday present from my Nana 4 00:00:35,413 --> 00:00:37,163 on my ninth birthday. 5 00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,283 It's my very first watch. 6 00:00:42,186 --> 00:00:44,719 On my 10th birthday, she died. 7 00:00:44,719 --> 00:00:46,136 - [Man] So sorry. 8 00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:49,440 And I'll bet you wind it every day 9 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:51,493 and you've never let it stop once. 10 00:00:51,493 --> 00:00:52,410 Am I right? 11 00:00:57,826 --> 00:00:59,987 - I have nothing to say today. 12 00:00:59,987 --> 00:01:04,400 - [Man] May I ask some silly questions then? 13 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:06,440 What kind of books did you read when you were a little girl? 14 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:08,293 - How little? 15 00:01:08,293 --> 00:01:10,000 When I was all sugar and spice? 16 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:12,083 - [Man] How old was that? 17 00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:16,447 - Nancy Drew, Anne Frank, Philip Roth. 18 00:01:19,547 --> 00:01:23,380 I like to think I'm still all sugar and spice. 19 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:25,993 Okay. 20 00:01:27,291 --> 00:01:30,041 You mean when I was, this little? 21 00:01:35,853 --> 00:01:38,640 I had so many friends that I suppose that's why 22 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,307 I didn't have time to read much. 23 00:01:42,490 --> 00:01:46,493 One of my friends, her parents had this karaoke machine. 24 00:01:46,493 --> 00:01:48,826 We would carry on for hours. 25 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:53,003 Her parents were so rich. 26 00:01:54,227 --> 00:01:55,060 So rich. 27 00:01:57,640 --> 00:02:01,390 They had this bathtub, this enormous bathtub. 28 00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:05,291 I suppose her parents used it more often to get dirty 29 00:02:05,291 --> 00:02:07,371 than to get clean. 30 00:02:07,371 --> 00:02:09,204 If you catch my drift. 31 00:02:11,813 --> 00:02:12,730 Five of us. 32 00:02:14,640 --> 00:02:15,557 Five of us. 33 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,387 Four friends and me. 34 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:21,913 I had so many friends. 35 00:02:23,359 --> 00:02:24,973 We were all so little that we'd squeeze 36 00:02:24,973 --> 00:02:27,853 into the bathtub together. 37 00:02:27,853 --> 00:02:29,400 It was disgusting. 38 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:30,650 But it was fun. 39 00:02:31,973 --> 00:02:33,223 Disgusting fun. 40 00:02:35,467 --> 00:02:37,627 Once we almost brought the karaoke machine in there 41 00:02:37,627 --> 00:02:41,079 with us, but one girl said we'd be electrified. 42 00:02:41,079 --> 00:02:43,373 That's what she said, electrified. 43 00:02:43,373 --> 00:02:44,790 Not electrocuted. 44 00:02:45,747 --> 00:02:48,747 She was wrong on both accounts. 45 00:02:48,747 --> 00:02:50,733 Once I checked into it I decided she was too stupid 46 00:02:50,733 --> 00:02:52,733 to be my friend anymore. 47 00:02:55,413 --> 00:02:56,830 I was so shallow. 48 00:02:59,107 --> 00:03:02,524 So shallow in the shallow end of the tub. 49 00:03:05,053 --> 00:03:06,386 I babysat a lot. 50 00:03:07,930 --> 00:03:11,597 Gee whiz, I suppose I was a born babysitter. 51 00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:15,677 I used to love giving babies baths. 52 00:03:17,067 --> 00:03:18,817 They smelled so good. 53 00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:23,053 I also love my dad's smell. 54 00:03:23,053 --> 00:03:25,636 The smell of his dental office. 55 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,120 I would sweat so much in a hot bath and come out 56 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,537 smelling so good. 57 00:03:35,213 --> 00:03:38,213 (gentle jazz music) 58 00:04:43,882 --> 00:04:45,415 - Oh you made it. 59 00:04:45,415 --> 00:04:46,909 Aw, sweetie. 60 00:04:46,909 --> 00:04:48,242 Good to see you. 61 00:04:49,125 --> 00:04:50,602 - I'm so proud of you, Mom. 62 00:04:50,602 --> 00:04:51,938 - I'd grow tumors for her. 63 00:04:51,938 --> 00:04:52,895 - I love your, Richard. 64 00:04:52,895 --> 00:04:53,895 - You're gonna be great. 65 00:04:53,895 --> 00:04:54,728 - Let's go, come on. 66 00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:59,615 - In the movie, Norma Ray, Norma has to explain to her 67 00:04:59,615 --> 00:05:02,868 children that she's a jailbird. 68 00:05:02,868 --> 00:05:06,068 And she feels compelled to put that scarlet letter 69 00:05:06,068 --> 00:05:09,042 in the proper context for her kids. 70 00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:10,495 So that they understand the principles 71 00:05:10,495 --> 00:05:14,375 for which she was jailed, so that they fully grasp 72 00:05:14,375 --> 00:05:17,855 that the reason their mommy was jailed was to make 73 00:05:17,855 --> 00:05:21,748 life better, for hundreds of other people. 74 00:05:21,748 --> 00:05:24,268 For hundreds of friends. 75 00:05:24,268 --> 00:05:26,821 For hundreds of other mommies, 76 00:05:26,821 --> 00:05:29,488 with whose children they played. 77 00:05:30,735 --> 00:05:31,568 Well, 78 00:05:32,828 --> 00:05:34,495 I'm a jailbird, too. 79 00:05:35,775 --> 00:05:39,762 I broke the law when the law stopped making sense to me. 80 00:05:39,762 --> 00:05:43,929 When a law that was wrong was hurting a great many people. 81 00:05:45,028 --> 00:05:49,615 I crossed state lines, and I paid a computer hacker 82 00:05:49,615 --> 00:05:53,988 a known felon, to track down a domestic terrorist. 83 00:05:53,988 --> 00:05:58,655 A man who had vowed to kill a Planned Parenthood doctor. 84 00:05:58,655 --> 00:06:03,028 A physician who performed abortions legally, safely 85 00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:04,278 and affordably. 86 00:06:05,868 --> 00:06:10,035 A man who also saved the lives of many other women. 87 00:06:11,135 --> 00:06:14,372 And I stalked this man, this terrorist, 88 00:06:14,372 --> 00:06:16,895 with the intent to kill him before he had a chance 89 00:06:16,895 --> 00:06:19,162 to commit his act. 90 00:06:19,162 --> 00:06:22,662 And I intended to kill him with a handgun, 91 00:06:23,654 --> 00:06:26,135 that I purchased legally from a gun shop. 92 00:06:26,135 --> 00:06:29,468 A gun shop owned by that very terrorist. 93 00:06:31,402 --> 00:06:33,908 But my plan was thwarted 94 00:06:33,908 --> 00:06:36,415 when a security camera mounted on that very clinic 95 00:06:36,415 --> 00:06:38,653 just a block away, 96 00:06:38,653 --> 00:06:42,653 spied my weapon in the passenger seat of my car. 97 00:06:43,694 --> 00:06:45,361 It was my passenger. 98 00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:50,522 I was sentenced to a year in prison. 99 00:06:50,522 --> 00:06:52,522 Released after 36 weeks. 100 00:06:54,855 --> 00:06:56,605 How's that for irony? 101 00:06:57,722 --> 00:07:02,506 But my imprisonment lead to a nationwide outcry. 102 00:07:02,506 --> 00:07:05,495 I don't have to tell you what it lead to. 103 00:07:05,495 --> 00:07:07,748 You were at the forefront. 104 00:07:07,748 --> 00:07:11,162 But that conflagration of protest, 105 00:07:11,162 --> 00:07:14,282 flickered to a few dying embers within a week. 106 00:07:14,282 --> 00:07:15,449 Maybe 10 days. 107 00:07:16,882 --> 00:07:21,415 Yeah, they used to wrap fish in day old newspaper. 108 00:07:21,415 --> 00:07:23,815 What do they wrap in day old cyber news? 109 00:07:23,815 --> 00:07:25,868 (laughing) 110 00:07:25,868 --> 00:07:30,035 And then you people, you people, Iris Glen people. 111 00:07:32,574 --> 00:07:35,074 You began to do a funny thing. 112 00:07:36,442 --> 00:07:39,442 You began to sign a petition. 113 00:07:39,442 --> 00:07:43,042 A petition that would put me on November's ballot 114 00:07:43,042 --> 00:07:45,479 as a mayoral candidate! 115 00:07:45,479 --> 00:07:50,254 (applause) (cheering) 116 00:07:50,254 --> 00:07:52,948 And I've decided to run! 117 00:07:52,948 --> 00:07:54,882 I've decided to win! 118 00:07:54,882 --> 00:07:56,653 I've decided to serve! 119 00:07:56,653 --> 00:07:58,903 (applause) 120 00:08:00,133 --> 00:08:03,216 (cutlery scratching) 121 00:08:10,093 --> 00:08:12,226 Three bites and it's back to work. 122 00:08:12,226 --> 00:08:14,383 I'm not gonna violate my first campaign promise 123 00:08:14,383 --> 00:08:16,440 only four hours after the polls close. 124 00:08:16,440 --> 00:08:17,786 - Now we'll worry about that tomorrow 125 00:08:17,786 --> 00:08:18,892 after you're sworn in. 126 00:08:18,892 --> 00:08:23,235 - [Harper] This is delicious, (mumbles). 127 00:08:23,235 --> 00:08:24,648 - [Nevada] Chew your food young lady. 128 00:08:24,648 --> 00:08:26,065 - [Harper] Sorry. 129 00:08:34,062 --> 00:08:36,288 - That's not pressure you're feeling, is it? 130 00:08:36,288 --> 00:08:38,871 - No, it's hunger, real hunger. 131 00:08:45,755 --> 00:08:47,255 - Okay, let's eat. 132 00:09:02,408 --> 00:09:04,528 - Where's Daddy? 133 00:09:04,528 --> 00:09:08,182 - He doesn't get back from his conference till tomorrow. 134 00:09:08,182 --> 00:09:10,141 - I heard a noise, and I was scared. 135 00:09:10,141 --> 00:09:11,891 - What kind of noise? 136 00:09:13,195 --> 00:09:14,445 - I don't know. 137 00:09:15,608 --> 00:09:17,025 Can't explain it. 138 00:09:19,366 --> 00:09:20,533 Silence maybe? 139 00:09:37,286 --> 00:09:39,869 (gentle music) 140 00:09:44,648 --> 00:09:47,565 (birds screeching) 141 00:09:50,922 --> 00:09:53,505 (gentle music) 142 00:10:09,546 --> 00:10:10,379 Thanks. 143 00:10:13,654 --> 00:10:16,237 (gentle music) 144 00:10:28,333 --> 00:10:30,750 (chattering) 145 00:10:32,602 --> 00:10:35,855 - Oh hey, this is my daughter, Nevada. 146 00:10:35,855 --> 00:10:37,042 This is Kurtis. 147 00:10:37,042 --> 00:10:39,416 (chattering) 148 00:10:39,416 --> 00:10:42,162 Kurtis is about to publish his first book. 149 00:10:42,162 --> 00:10:43,229 - [Nevada] Grandma. 150 00:10:43,229 --> 00:10:45,481 - Oh sweetheart, good to see you. 151 00:10:45,481 --> 00:10:46,536 You look gorgeous. 152 00:10:46,536 --> 00:10:47,536 - Thank you. 153 00:10:48,376 --> 00:10:50,126 Thank you, thank you. 154 00:10:53,936 --> 00:10:56,269 Hi, can I have a glass of ice tea? 155 00:10:56,269 --> 00:10:57,936 That would be super. 156 00:10:59,056 --> 00:11:01,043 - [Woman] Would you like some potato salad? 157 00:11:01,043 --> 00:11:05,210 - [Nevada] I'm gonna, yeah, I'm gonna hit that up. 158 00:11:16,496 --> 00:11:17,389 Daddy, help me. 159 00:11:17,389 --> 00:11:19,589 - Nevada Smith, my favorite waitress. 160 00:11:19,589 --> 00:11:21,883 - I thought I was your favorite ballerina. 161 00:11:21,883 --> 00:11:24,050 - Not since you were five. 162 00:11:33,549 --> 00:11:35,616 - You are such a pig. 163 00:11:35,616 --> 00:11:38,523 - I love corn on the cob. 164 00:11:38,523 --> 00:11:42,640 It's taste, it's texture, with butter, without butter. 165 00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:44,890 - You really do, don't you? 166 00:11:47,203 --> 00:11:49,483 What are you doing out here? 167 00:11:49,483 --> 00:11:52,566 Are you pissed at someone back there? 168 00:11:56,876 --> 00:11:57,709 - Oh no. 169 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,157 - Now you sound scared. 170 00:12:04,269 --> 00:12:07,686 I never heard that sound from you before. 171 00:12:09,876 --> 00:12:11,641 - I can only recall being this scared once before 172 00:12:11,641 --> 00:12:12,558 in my life. 173 00:12:14,296 --> 00:12:15,129 - Daddy? 174 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:22,473 - 17. 175 00:12:26,499 --> 00:12:29,806 I was 17 years old, and I was working 176 00:12:29,806 --> 00:12:32,639 as a delivery boy at a local deli. 177 00:12:33,513 --> 00:12:35,763 It's still there, the deli. 178 00:12:37,606 --> 00:12:39,523 Different delivery boy. 179 00:12:40,833 --> 00:12:43,753 After work, it must have been just before midnight. 180 00:12:43,753 --> 00:12:45,586 I was clowning around. 181 00:12:46,539 --> 00:12:48,843 Trying to look like a big shot. 182 00:12:48,843 --> 00:12:51,166 I played a game of chicken with another kid 183 00:12:51,166 --> 00:12:54,686 who worked at the deli, on the street, 184 00:12:54,686 --> 00:12:58,433 on the four lane street for the affections of a 185 00:12:58,433 --> 00:13:01,016 17 year old who worked with us. 186 00:13:02,353 --> 00:13:05,313 We told her she would have to make out with whomever 187 00:13:05,313 --> 00:13:08,683 would lie down the longest, prone on the dark street. 188 00:13:08,683 --> 00:13:12,600 As a car approached, before escaping to safety. 189 00:13:17,953 --> 00:13:18,786 Stupid. 190 00:13:21,819 --> 00:13:25,043 He was my best friend at the time. 191 00:13:25,043 --> 00:13:28,256 I barely knew her, but she had just started working 192 00:13:28,256 --> 00:13:32,336 at the deli and we'd heard that she was recently dating 193 00:13:32,336 --> 00:13:35,349 the much older owner of an aquarium in the same strip mall 194 00:13:35,349 --> 00:13:39,016 and that he had taught her how to do things. 195 00:13:41,893 --> 00:13:42,810 Sex things. 196 00:13:45,187 --> 00:13:49,270 I was still a virgin, so my imagination ran wild. 197 00:13:53,439 --> 00:13:56,589 I don't think I wanted to win. 198 00:13:56,589 --> 00:13:59,149 I was terrified of what the aquarium owner might 199 00:13:59,149 --> 00:14:00,763 have taught her. 200 00:14:00,763 --> 00:14:04,882 Things that would make me look foolish to her. 201 00:14:04,882 --> 00:14:07,965 Of course she'd agreed to none of it. 202 00:14:09,172 --> 00:14:12,922 My buddy had already slept with a girl, so... 203 00:14:14,163 --> 00:14:15,830 I was in it for him. 204 00:14:20,309 --> 00:14:22,962 After he was run over, 205 00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:25,379 no one paid me any attention. 206 00:14:26,546 --> 00:14:28,679 Not even after he had his leg amputated. 207 00:14:28,679 --> 00:14:31,852 No one, not him, not his parents. 208 00:14:31,852 --> 00:14:33,293 It was as if I was nothing more than 209 00:14:33,293 --> 00:14:35,460 a late arriving bystander. 210 00:14:38,893 --> 00:14:42,310 I felt so much fear every day after that. 211 00:14:44,159 --> 00:14:47,742 It was as if their silence was taunting me. 212 00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:52,636 The girl never spoke to me again. 213 00:14:52,636 --> 00:14:55,886 My own parents would speak to me for... 214 00:14:56,922 --> 00:14:57,755 Months. 215 00:14:59,281 --> 00:15:00,760 The only one who would even say hello to me was 216 00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:03,343 the guy who owned the aquarium. 217 00:15:06,958 --> 00:15:08,875 I was scared for years. 218 00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:12,139 Until I met your mom. 219 00:15:12,139 --> 00:15:16,056 Even then, she knew how to vanquish fear and... 220 00:15:17,109 --> 00:15:19,609 Make you feel worth something. 221 00:15:20,532 --> 00:15:21,699 Make you feel, 222 00:15:24,786 --> 00:15:27,786 make you appreciate your full worth. 223 00:15:32,732 --> 00:15:34,732 - Dad you're scaring me. 224 00:15:38,751 --> 00:15:39,918 - Look at you. 225 00:15:41,215 --> 00:15:42,548 It blows my mind 226 00:15:44,336 --> 00:15:48,503 that I was able to make something as perfect, as beautiful. 227 00:15:51,608 --> 00:15:52,441 As you. 228 00:15:57,074 --> 00:15:59,574 See the men in that car there? 229 00:16:02,856 --> 00:16:05,523 I'm going to be arrested, honey. 230 00:16:07,542 --> 00:16:09,042 I don't fear jail. 231 00:16:11,723 --> 00:16:14,262 What I fear is that the kid with the amputated leg 232 00:16:14,262 --> 00:16:16,845 is finally gonna come after me. 233 00:16:18,593 --> 00:16:20,760 (mumbles) 234 00:16:33,616 --> 00:16:36,533 (birds screeching) 235 00:16:39,066 --> 00:16:42,395 - You know, some people call me an activist. 236 00:16:42,395 --> 00:16:45,053 Others call me something else. 237 00:16:45,053 --> 00:16:47,114 (laughing) 238 00:16:47,114 --> 00:16:49,683 I think it's a word that begins with C. 239 00:16:49,683 --> 00:16:51,773 (laughing) 240 00:16:51,773 --> 00:16:52,714 Crack pot! 241 00:16:52,714 --> 00:16:54,565 (laughing) 242 00:16:54,565 --> 00:16:58,258 All paradigms begin with crack pots. 243 00:16:58,258 --> 00:17:02,425 Revolution isn't easy, making history legally is hard. 244 00:17:08,947 --> 00:17:11,843 Does anyone know what this is behind me? 245 00:17:11,843 --> 00:17:13,561 It's Vermont's flag. 246 00:17:13,561 --> 00:17:17,728 Not it's state flag, it's the flag of the nation of Vermont. 247 00:17:18,668 --> 00:17:21,995 More specifically, the Second Vermont Republic. 248 00:17:21,995 --> 00:17:26,896 A movement founded by an economics professor in 2003. 249 00:17:26,896 --> 00:17:30,194 In a recent article, in the New York Times, 250 00:17:30,194 --> 00:17:33,078 they reported that the Obama Administration had been 251 00:17:33,078 --> 00:17:36,663 floonded with secession petitions by eight states, 252 00:17:36,663 --> 00:17:40,830 including Texas, as state whose laws I find dubious. 253 00:17:42,935 --> 00:17:46,295 (audience murmuring) 254 00:17:46,295 --> 00:17:50,295 The Texas petitioned, signed by 125,746 citizens 255 00:17:52,910 --> 00:17:55,924 declared that withdrawing from the union was quote 256 00:17:55,924 --> 00:18:00,091 practically feasible, since the state had a balanced budget. 257 00:18:01,285 --> 00:18:03,856 And Austin is its capital for crying out loud, 258 00:18:03,856 --> 00:18:06,530 so Texas can't be all bad, am I right? 259 00:18:06,530 --> 00:18:08,780 (laughing) 260 00:18:10,517 --> 00:18:14,190 The Vermont movement embraces many of the same values 261 00:18:14,190 --> 00:18:16,190 as our founding fathers. 262 00:18:17,132 --> 00:18:18,465 Ideals are hard. 263 00:18:20,268 --> 00:18:22,344 They're hard to conjure up. 264 00:18:22,344 --> 00:18:25,316 They're hard to wrap other people's minds around. 265 00:18:25,316 --> 00:18:30,124 And they're hardest of all to achieve and maintain. 266 00:18:30,124 --> 00:18:31,408 - [Nevada] You dropped acid? 267 00:18:31,408 --> 00:18:33,585 - [Richard] Isn't that statutory rape charge worse? 268 00:18:33,585 --> 00:18:35,341 - [Harper] It was my LSD. 269 00:18:35,341 --> 00:18:37,088 - You're forgiving him? 270 00:18:37,088 --> 00:18:38,432 He was inside another woman. 271 00:18:38,432 --> 00:18:40,000 - [Richard] A girl. 272 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,494 - Is there any lust? 273 00:18:41,494 --> 00:18:42,503 There's a 10 year old who's moved in down the block 274 00:18:42,503 --> 00:18:44,086 I've had my eye on. 275 00:18:44,970 --> 00:18:46,117 Where you going? 276 00:18:46,117 --> 00:18:48,383 - [Harper] To get you some Valium. 277 00:18:48,383 --> 00:18:51,800 - (grunts) Unbelievable. 278 00:18:54,850 --> 00:18:57,088 Dad, why don't you just pull out the nitrous, hmm? 279 00:18:57,088 --> 00:19:00,048 That used to calm me down just fine. 280 00:19:00,048 --> 00:19:02,210 And you're gonna start a country. 281 00:19:02,210 --> 00:19:03,823 - [Harper] Yes, but first I'm giving my daughter 282 00:19:03,823 --> 00:19:06,103 10 milligrams of Valium. 283 00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:06,936 Take this. 284 00:19:07,970 --> 00:19:10,637 - Do you remember last August when Mom and I 285 00:19:10,637 --> 00:19:14,596 went to Jones Beach to see John Fogerty and Jackson Browne? 286 00:19:14,596 --> 00:19:16,010 - [Nevada] Pathetic. 287 00:19:16,010 --> 00:19:18,970 - Do you even know their work? 288 00:19:18,970 --> 00:19:20,742 - Not really. 289 00:19:20,742 --> 00:19:21,928 - Pathetic. 290 00:19:21,928 --> 00:19:23,807 - Before we left for the show, 291 00:19:23,807 --> 00:19:25,140 we dropped acid. 292 00:19:26,088 --> 00:19:29,421 It had been 30 years, but we kept a vial 293 00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:33,950 in the back of the freezer. 294 00:19:35,103 --> 00:19:38,583 The show began and I was tripping and I needed to go 295 00:19:38,583 --> 00:19:40,083 to the men's room. 296 00:19:41,357 --> 00:19:45,623 That was the last time I saw Mom until I got home. 297 00:19:45,623 --> 00:19:48,743 She was already in bed sleeping when I got home. 298 00:19:48,743 --> 00:19:49,980 (chuckles) 299 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:53,397 I have no recollection of how I got home. 300 00:19:54,608 --> 00:19:56,343 When I walked into the men's room, there were, 301 00:19:56,343 --> 00:19:58,743 and I have no idea why, there were half a dozen cans 302 00:19:58,743 --> 00:20:01,597 of spray paint in the corner of the room. 303 00:20:01,597 --> 00:20:03,347 All different colors. 304 00:20:04,610 --> 00:20:06,490 Well, maybe different colors. 305 00:20:06,490 --> 00:20:08,810 There was a simple lock on the men's room door, 306 00:20:08,810 --> 00:20:10,643 so I locked myself in. 307 00:20:11,730 --> 00:20:15,717 And instantly all of the sounds occurring outside 308 00:20:15,717 --> 00:20:17,782 of the room clicked off. 309 00:20:17,782 --> 00:20:19,557 They didn't fade out, they just switched off as 310 00:20:19,557 --> 00:20:22,782 if there was a power failure. 311 00:20:22,782 --> 00:20:27,022 Not even the music could penetrate my trip. 312 00:20:27,022 --> 00:20:30,335 So I gathered up the cans, and I began to paint the 313 00:20:30,335 --> 00:20:34,477 floor, it looked like a blank canvas to me 314 00:20:34,477 --> 00:20:37,221 and so I decided I needed to create a mural, 315 00:20:37,221 --> 00:20:41,903 so I did and I don't paint, but there was some pretty 316 00:20:41,903 --> 00:20:43,797 impressive shit I was spraying. 317 00:20:43,797 --> 00:20:45,063 - What was Mom doing? 318 00:20:45,063 --> 00:20:47,157 - I tell you what I can remember later. 319 00:20:47,157 --> 00:20:48,623 - Don't do drugs. 320 00:20:48,623 --> 00:20:50,303 (chuckles) 321 00:20:50,303 --> 00:20:52,423 I painted an amusement park. 322 00:20:52,423 --> 00:20:56,590 Rides, cotton candy vendors, side shows, freak shows. 323 00:20:57,742 --> 00:21:02,423 One side of the park was day, the other was night. 324 00:21:02,423 --> 00:21:06,506 And then she, this girl, walked out of one of the 325 00:21:08,322 --> 00:21:10,822 men's room stalls, she was 16. 326 00:21:13,070 --> 00:21:15,776 It didn't seem odd to me that this young woman was 327 00:21:15,776 --> 00:21:19,870 relieving herself in an otherwise empty man's room. 328 00:21:19,870 --> 00:21:23,470 - Maybe it wasn't actually otherwise empty. 329 00:21:23,470 --> 00:21:24,970 - Maybe it wasn't. 330 00:21:26,043 --> 00:21:28,936 But she began conversing with me as if she'd been 331 00:21:28,936 --> 00:21:31,363 watching me all along. 332 00:21:31,363 --> 00:21:34,590 I described my park to her, the people and the families 333 00:21:34,590 --> 00:21:37,348 in the park but all she could see in my painting were 334 00:21:37,348 --> 00:21:38,515 sexual things. 335 00:21:40,150 --> 00:21:43,983 She was probably high off her ass, not on LSD. 336 00:21:47,363 --> 00:21:48,696 She made me cry. 337 00:21:49,603 --> 00:21:52,203 She brought me to tears because she couldn't see 338 00:21:52,203 --> 00:21:54,953 what I was seeing in my painting. 339 00:21:56,536 --> 00:21:59,803 She said if we had sex, maybe I could understand 340 00:21:59,803 --> 00:22:01,470 what she was seeing. 341 00:22:02,563 --> 00:22:07,056 And suddenly I imagined it was the end of the world. 342 00:22:07,056 --> 00:22:09,842 And I thought of all the things I might do 343 00:22:09,842 --> 00:22:13,259 if I knew the world was coming to an end. 344 00:22:14,696 --> 00:22:16,946 And so, I had sex with her. 345 00:22:21,390 --> 00:22:24,803 Afterwards, she left the room, and I continued to 346 00:22:24,803 --> 00:22:27,083 paint the floor and that's all I remember about that 347 00:22:27,083 --> 00:22:28,833 night at Jones Beach. 348 00:22:30,243 --> 00:22:33,523 She got pregnant, and she had an abortion. 349 00:22:33,523 --> 00:22:35,790 And she posted the story of her experience, 350 00:22:35,790 --> 00:22:38,373 of our experience, on Facebook. 351 00:22:40,629 --> 00:22:43,950 And so here we are, this woman-- 352 00:22:43,950 --> 00:22:44,783 - Girl. 353 00:22:46,016 --> 00:22:46,849 Girl. 354 00:22:48,523 --> 00:22:51,690 (laughing) Oh my God. 355 00:22:52,763 --> 00:22:55,123 Oh my God, this girl doesn't live anywhere Iris Glen, 356 00:22:55,123 --> 00:22:56,203 does she? 357 00:22:56,203 --> 00:22:57,036 - No. 358 00:23:01,585 --> 00:23:02,723 - And where are you going? 359 00:23:02,723 --> 00:23:05,870 - [Richard] I'll be right back. 360 00:23:05,870 --> 00:23:09,576 - Conspiracy to commit murder and now statutory rape. 361 00:23:09,576 --> 00:23:13,743 You're approval rating is sure to hit an all time high, Mom. 362 00:23:16,643 --> 00:23:17,560 What is it? 363 00:23:18,590 --> 00:23:21,470 - They're from my first year of dentistry, 364 00:23:21,470 --> 00:23:25,002 when I shared a practice with three other young dentists. 365 00:23:25,002 --> 00:23:28,310 I worked on kids almost exclusively then. 366 00:23:28,310 --> 00:23:30,736 Kids were so afraid of the dentist. 367 00:23:30,736 --> 00:23:34,350 But I won them over, I quelled their terror. 368 00:23:34,350 --> 00:23:37,081 Almost without exception, my young patients hand wrote 369 00:23:37,081 --> 00:23:40,003 thank you cards and letters to me. 370 00:23:40,003 --> 00:23:42,443 Some said they were inspired to be dentists themselves 371 00:23:42,443 --> 00:23:43,896 so they could grow up and teach the next generation 372 00:23:43,896 --> 00:23:47,813 of kids not to be afraid of the dentist. 373 00:23:47,813 --> 00:23:49,896 - Most of these are from girls. 374 00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:51,270 It's creepy. 375 00:23:51,270 --> 00:23:53,416 - You're trying hard to hate me. 376 00:23:53,416 --> 00:23:55,749 Nevada, this is the real me. 377 00:23:58,083 --> 00:24:00,500 Please hold onto them for me. 378 00:24:01,614 --> 00:24:02,963 - Who's gonna tell Jude? 379 00:24:02,963 --> 00:24:05,790 - I already did, I Skyped with your sister this morning. 380 00:24:05,790 --> 00:24:08,350 Well actually middle of the night, our time. 381 00:24:08,350 --> 00:24:11,920 I wanted to get her before she went to work. 382 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,136 - [Nevada] What did she say? 383 00:24:14,136 --> 00:24:16,386 - Our call was interrupted. 384 00:24:17,243 --> 00:24:19,736 She got a text that a young boy had just been shot 385 00:24:19,736 --> 00:24:24,681 and she was needed some place, some place dangerous. 386 00:24:24,681 --> 00:24:28,402 - There are so many things that I wanted to do with you. 387 00:24:28,402 --> 00:24:30,070 - Put 'em on a list. 388 00:24:30,070 --> 00:24:32,296 Bury 'em in a time capsule. 389 00:24:32,296 --> 00:24:34,463 We'll dig 'em up together. 390 00:24:36,230 --> 00:24:40,936 - There you go again, charming the pants off me. 391 00:24:40,936 --> 00:24:42,019 What a waste. 392 00:24:43,816 --> 00:24:46,483 You could have been a great dad. 393 00:24:47,510 --> 00:24:49,681 - Right now, tell me one of the things you 394 00:24:49,681 --> 00:24:50,693 wanted to do with me. 395 00:24:50,693 --> 00:24:52,283 - [Nevada] No. 396 00:24:52,283 --> 00:24:53,116 - Nevada. 397 00:24:54,510 --> 00:24:56,260 It'll get me through. 398 00:24:57,402 --> 00:24:58,987 Why not? 399 00:24:58,987 --> 00:25:02,110 - Because I don't want to get my hopes up. 400 00:25:02,110 --> 00:25:04,321 Just in case I hate you as much when you get out of prison 401 00:25:04,321 --> 00:25:05,321 as I do now. 402 00:25:07,443 --> 00:25:10,193 How's that for a going away gift? 403 00:25:24,666 --> 00:25:28,083 (computer keys clicking) 404 00:25:41,721 --> 00:25:44,971 (tennis ball smacking) 405 00:26:33,955 --> 00:26:35,555 What? 406 00:26:35,555 --> 00:26:39,138 - I'm really sorry but I've gotta say this. 407 00:26:42,528 --> 00:26:46,195 You have the greatest legs I have ever seen. 408 00:26:47,781 --> 00:26:50,245 It even looked like you were moving in slow motion. 409 00:26:50,245 --> 00:26:52,846 - I was in slow motion. 410 00:26:52,846 --> 00:26:56,115 - I've been watching you for a week, or so. 411 00:26:56,115 --> 00:26:58,421 - A week or so, huh? 412 00:26:58,421 --> 00:27:00,928 See that guy over there. 413 00:27:00,928 --> 00:27:03,011 - [Otto] Yeah, who is he? 414 00:27:04,981 --> 00:27:07,848 - He's been watching me for over four years. 415 00:27:07,848 --> 00:27:10,015 So, you're not so special. 416 00:27:12,315 --> 00:27:13,565 - I am special. 417 00:27:18,221 --> 00:27:19,698 What's he doing to the kid? 418 00:27:19,698 --> 00:27:21,968 - He's feeding the kid. 419 00:27:21,968 --> 00:27:23,878 Kid's name is Brett. 420 00:27:23,878 --> 00:27:26,285 I'm babysitting the kid. 421 00:27:26,285 --> 00:27:29,581 I gotta make a living too, ya know. 422 00:27:29,581 --> 00:27:32,847 I don't know what the guy's name is. 423 00:27:32,847 --> 00:27:34,165 You like tennis? 424 00:27:34,165 --> 00:27:35,821 - You don't know anything about that guy? 425 00:27:35,821 --> 00:27:36,821 - It's okay. 426 00:27:37,861 --> 00:27:39,872 He's my ball boy. 427 00:27:39,872 --> 00:27:43,039 I love the attention, it's flattering. 428 00:27:44,061 --> 00:27:47,928 Makes me feel like I'm gonna live forever. 429 00:27:47,928 --> 00:27:49,678 I change the diapers. 430 00:27:50,608 --> 00:27:51,441 - Who's? 431 00:27:53,088 --> 00:27:55,741 You like getting attention from that guy? 432 00:27:55,741 --> 00:27:57,301 - Wouldn't you rather know if I don't mind 433 00:27:57,301 --> 00:27:58,981 getting your attention? 434 00:27:58,981 --> 00:28:02,301 I know you've been watching me for ever. 435 00:28:02,301 --> 00:28:05,218 You're really not so different, eh? 436 00:28:12,075 --> 00:28:13,395 - My name's Otto. 437 00:28:13,395 --> 00:28:14,228 - Otto what? 438 00:28:14,228 --> 00:28:15,741 - Otto Breyer. 439 00:28:15,741 --> 00:28:16,648 - Nevada. 440 00:28:16,648 --> 00:28:17,481 - Nevada what? 441 00:28:17,481 --> 00:28:19,768 - Smith, you're leering at me. 442 00:28:19,768 --> 00:28:21,268 - I beg to differ. 443 00:28:24,074 --> 00:28:25,074 - I'm tough. 444 00:28:26,168 --> 00:28:27,381 - I'm tough. 445 00:28:27,381 --> 00:28:28,648 - Really? 446 00:28:28,648 --> 00:28:29,635 If I let you punch me in the stomach, 447 00:28:29,635 --> 00:28:31,061 will you let me punch you in the stomach? 448 00:28:31,061 --> 00:28:31,894 - I am not-- 449 00:28:31,894 --> 00:28:33,845 (grunts) 450 00:28:33,845 --> 00:28:36,678 (heavy breathing) 451 00:28:39,106 --> 00:28:41,356 (coughing) 452 00:28:42,374 --> 00:28:44,111 (grunts) 453 00:28:44,111 --> 00:28:46,361 (coughing) 454 00:28:47,711 --> 00:28:49,961 (groaning) 455 00:29:10,524 --> 00:29:12,774 (coughing) 456 00:29:15,364 --> 00:29:18,197 (heavy breathing) 457 00:29:34,178 --> 00:29:37,042 (laughing) 458 00:29:37,042 --> 00:29:39,351 - [Nevada] I didn't think you'd do it. 459 00:29:39,351 --> 00:29:42,184 (heavy breathing) 460 00:29:49,031 --> 00:29:51,531 Come on, I gotta get the baby. 461 00:30:06,058 --> 00:30:08,475 How are you doing, beautiful? 462 00:30:21,004 --> 00:30:24,231 - [Otto] I've read Bukowski's Women, loved it. 463 00:30:24,231 --> 00:30:26,841 Danced at the Viper Club in West Hollywood. 464 00:30:26,841 --> 00:30:29,524 Didn't live up to the hype. 465 00:30:29,524 --> 00:30:32,284 I adore sentimental education. 466 00:30:32,284 --> 00:30:33,551 - Do you ever work? 467 00:30:33,551 --> 00:30:37,831 - I do very well, I am Executive VP of Business Development 468 00:30:37,831 --> 00:30:40,511 for a company called Think Already. 469 00:30:40,511 --> 00:30:42,261 No exclamation point. 470 00:30:43,324 --> 00:30:45,298 - Business development? 471 00:30:45,298 --> 00:30:47,511 You develop businesses? 472 00:30:47,511 --> 00:30:49,001 Like developing photos? 473 00:30:49,001 --> 00:30:51,471 - People don't really develop photos anymore. 474 00:30:51,471 --> 00:30:52,871 - Do you every worry that people won't develop 475 00:30:52,871 --> 00:30:55,038 businesses anymore either? 476 00:30:57,853 --> 00:30:59,644 Okay, what businesses? 477 00:30:59,644 --> 00:31:01,921 - Hybrid businesses, wondrous businesses, 478 00:31:01,921 --> 00:31:04,471 destination sites, and that's hard these days, 479 00:31:04,471 --> 00:31:07,831 thanks to Mr. Bezos, but I'm good at it. 480 00:31:07,831 --> 00:31:12,684 For example, we all know most women love to try on shoes. 481 00:31:12,684 --> 00:31:15,324 And most women get pregnant at one time or another 482 00:31:15,324 --> 00:31:18,654 and have to expand so to speak, their wardrobe, 483 00:31:18,654 --> 00:31:22,821 so I came up with the barefoot and pregnant chain. 484 00:31:24,067 --> 00:31:25,057 - Clever. 485 00:31:25,057 --> 00:31:27,204 But it sounds like a one hit wonder. 486 00:31:27,204 --> 00:31:28,097 What else? 487 00:31:28,097 --> 00:31:30,564 - I'm just getting started, Nevada Smith. 488 00:31:30,564 --> 00:31:32,417 Everyone loves ice cream. 489 00:31:32,417 --> 00:31:34,584 And, everybody has to die. 490 00:31:35,646 --> 00:31:38,137 There's a franchise in New Hampshire and Maine 491 00:31:38,137 --> 00:31:41,308 called Heaven and Hell, that one's mine, too. 492 00:31:41,308 --> 00:31:44,124 - Is ice cream the heaven or hell part? 493 00:31:44,124 --> 00:31:45,991 - [Otto] It's also a crematorium. 494 00:31:45,991 --> 00:31:48,074 It's a ice cream-atorium. 495 00:31:49,351 --> 00:31:51,937 - That chain is successful? 496 00:31:51,937 --> 00:31:54,577 - We had to throw in a bar for good measure. 497 00:31:54,577 --> 00:31:56,510 It's doing good. 498 00:31:56,510 --> 00:31:58,010 It's coming along. 499 00:31:59,028 --> 00:32:01,937 - No offense, but it sounds a tad easy. 500 00:32:01,937 --> 00:32:02,770 Your job. 501 00:32:03,737 --> 00:32:04,570 - You think? 502 00:32:04,570 --> 00:32:06,724 Always up for some competition, huh? 503 00:32:06,724 --> 00:32:09,724 Okay, knock yourself out, any ideas? 504 00:32:11,977 --> 00:32:12,810 - Okay. 505 00:32:16,603 --> 00:32:19,020 Everyone's online these days. 506 00:32:20,070 --> 00:32:20,903 And... 507 00:32:24,257 --> 00:32:26,507 Nuts are very good for you. 508 00:32:27,964 --> 00:32:29,697 Inter-nuts. 509 00:32:29,697 --> 00:32:30,530 Snacks. 510 00:32:34,430 --> 00:32:36,790 Aw, I like your ideas. 511 00:32:36,790 --> 00:32:37,623 I did. 512 00:32:38,590 --> 00:32:40,173 I liked your ideas. 513 00:32:41,430 --> 00:32:44,217 You wanna know something embarrassing about me? 514 00:32:44,217 --> 00:32:48,134 I have a paralyzing fear of the sight of blood. 515 00:32:50,373 --> 00:32:53,110 My father was so disappointed I wouldn't follow 516 00:32:53,110 --> 00:32:55,082 in his footsteps. 517 00:32:55,082 --> 00:32:56,332 He's a dentist. 518 00:32:57,430 --> 00:33:00,697 My sister, she's the (mumbles) of our family. 519 00:33:00,697 --> 00:33:03,030 She is a pediatrician. 520 00:33:03,030 --> 00:33:06,041 So she's a saint to both of my parents. 521 00:33:06,041 --> 00:33:08,961 I pass out when I see a kid with a bloody nose. 522 00:33:08,961 --> 00:33:11,470 - You and your sister get along okay? 523 00:33:11,470 --> 00:33:13,220 - She's my hero, too. 524 00:33:14,617 --> 00:33:18,450 She's in the Ukraine, Doctors Without Borders. 525 00:33:19,537 --> 00:33:22,204 So I only see her when we Skype. 526 00:33:23,284 --> 00:33:26,644 I had another sister, but she died of cancer when she was 527 00:33:26,644 --> 00:33:28,894 a baby, she was only three. 528 00:33:34,189 --> 00:33:36,439 - What about bloody movies? 529 00:33:37,724 --> 00:33:39,974 - Oh, you don't wanna know. 530 00:33:41,990 --> 00:33:43,534 - [Otto] What about your period? 531 00:33:43,534 --> 00:33:45,680 - Ah, you wanna know? 532 00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:49,847 I keep a big month calendar in my bedroom to remind me. 533 00:33:51,465 --> 00:33:53,215 To be fully prepared. 534 00:33:54,484 --> 00:33:56,417 My friends, my friends do it online, 535 00:33:56,417 --> 00:33:59,644 and what if their computer crashed? 536 00:33:59,644 --> 00:34:03,299 It's chilling, I don't leave anything up for chance. 537 00:34:03,299 --> 00:34:06,350 So that's why I'm also on the pill. 538 00:34:06,350 --> 00:34:07,183 - Wow. 539 00:34:08,910 --> 00:34:11,790 - Are you glad to hear I'm on the pill, Otto Breyer? 540 00:34:11,790 --> 00:34:13,857 - [Otto] Ecstatic. 541 00:34:13,857 --> 00:34:16,550 - Do you like to play tennis? 542 00:34:16,550 --> 00:34:18,950 - You mean a game where you hit something 543 00:34:18,950 --> 00:34:21,377 and it doesn't hit you back? 544 00:34:21,377 --> 00:34:24,228 - I gotta be honest, your name is really dumb. 545 00:34:24,228 --> 00:34:27,311 - My dad was an English Lit professor 546 00:34:28,350 --> 00:34:31,897 and thought it would be noble or funny anyway 547 00:34:31,897 --> 00:34:35,300 to come up with palindrome for my name. 548 00:34:35,300 --> 00:34:38,297 - Thank God you don't have any siblings. 549 00:34:38,297 --> 00:34:41,270 What do you mean was an English Lit professor? 550 00:34:41,270 --> 00:34:42,437 Is he retired? 551 00:34:43,390 --> 00:34:45,473 - He died, six years ago. 552 00:34:46,884 --> 00:34:49,015 Pancreatic cancer. 553 00:34:49,015 --> 00:34:50,337 - I'm really sorry. 554 00:34:50,337 --> 00:34:52,737 - I'm really pissed. 555 00:34:52,737 --> 00:34:55,904 I did want to follow in his footsteps, 556 00:34:56,989 --> 00:34:58,822 be a teacher, but I... 557 00:35:03,164 --> 00:35:05,670 My grades plummeted when he got sick, 558 00:35:05,670 --> 00:35:08,657 so I had to find a job that didn't require 559 00:35:08,657 --> 00:35:10,907 an advanced degree, or a... 560 00:35:12,750 --> 00:35:13,583 A degree. 561 00:35:15,577 --> 00:35:18,284 - You can still follow in his footsteps. 562 00:35:18,284 --> 00:35:19,701 - He was a Mensa. 563 00:35:22,297 --> 00:35:24,217 Tough act to follow. 564 00:35:24,217 --> 00:35:25,467 - So is my dad. 565 00:35:26,470 --> 00:35:28,387 He's embarrassed by it. 566 00:35:29,417 --> 00:35:31,000 Did he suffer much? 567 00:35:32,337 --> 00:35:35,310 - Why do people ask that question? 568 00:35:35,310 --> 00:35:37,124 Why should you care, really? 569 00:35:37,124 --> 00:35:39,217 When did that become (speaking in foreign language)? 570 00:35:39,217 --> 00:35:41,377 Do you know the meaning of (speaking in foreign language)? 571 00:35:41,377 --> 00:35:44,164 Did it make you feel like a better person to ask me that? 572 00:35:44,164 --> 00:35:45,914 - Did he suffer much? 573 00:35:48,110 --> 00:35:48,943 - Yes. 574 00:35:54,590 --> 00:35:57,017 What does your mom do? 575 00:35:57,017 --> 00:35:58,017 - Housewife. 576 00:35:59,535 --> 00:36:02,844 I own an house in Ireland, in County Clare. 577 00:36:02,844 --> 00:36:05,350 About 100,000 people live there. 578 00:36:05,350 --> 00:36:07,110 It was my grandfather's. 579 00:36:07,110 --> 00:36:09,577 - Do you have a picture of it? 580 00:36:09,577 --> 00:36:11,327 - I've never seen it. 581 00:36:12,177 --> 00:36:13,430 - Why? 582 00:36:13,430 --> 00:36:15,617 - I'm afraid I'd fall in love with it. 583 00:36:15,617 --> 00:36:18,589 That it would be like looking at something 584 00:36:18,589 --> 00:36:22,339 out of a fairy tale, like out of a storybook. 585 00:36:25,084 --> 00:36:27,510 That's not real life. 586 00:36:27,510 --> 00:36:29,377 - (mumbles) my ass. 587 00:36:29,377 --> 00:36:31,960 Come over to my house tomorrow. 588 00:37:03,350 --> 00:37:05,284 - [Male Reporter] Miss Smith? 589 00:37:05,284 --> 00:37:07,137 I'm a reporter with the Times, I'd like to schedule 590 00:37:07,137 --> 00:37:08,244 and interview with you. 591 00:37:08,244 --> 00:37:10,429 - [Harper] Ah, didn't you used to write for Rolling Stone? 592 00:37:10,429 --> 00:37:11,524 - [Male Reporter] You're a rock star. 593 00:37:11,524 --> 00:37:14,362 Mrs. Smith goes to Washington. 594 00:37:14,362 --> 00:37:16,524 - [Harper] Oh you're good. 595 00:37:16,524 --> 00:37:19,144 - [Male Reporter] Medical Center, nothing wrong with you, 596 00:37:19,144 --> 00:37:19,984 is there? 597 00:37:19,984 --> 00:37:21,890 - [Harper] Well, I'm having my annual physical. 598 00:37:21,890 --> 00:37:23,462 You wanna come with me? 599 00:37:23,462 --> 00:37:25,717 - [Male Reporter] No, I saw that in a movie once. 600 00:37:25,717 --> 00:37:27,050 Never ends well. 601 00:37:28,064 --> 00:37:29,023 - [Harper] Gimme your card. 602 00:37:29,023 --> 00:37:31,090 I'll give you something. 603 00:37:31,090 --> 00:37:31,923 Soon. 604 00:37:32,957 --> 00:37:35,837 - [Male Reporter] Thank you. 605 00:37:35,837 --> 00:37:36,670 Really. 606 00:37:37,704 --> 00:37:38,537 - 17,621. 607 00:37:42,277 --> 00:37:45,194 That's the population of Iris Glen. 608 00:37:46,157 --> 00:37:49,074 Our unemployment rate is 0.4%. 609 00:37:51,860 --> 00:37:53,110 Impossibly low? 610 00:37:53,997 --> 00:37:55,330 No, coincidence? 611 00:37:57,584 --> 00:37:59,022 Providence? 612 00:37:59,022 --> 00:37:59,939 No, 17,621. 613 00:38:05,863 --> 00:38:07,446 Eight billionaires. 614 00:38:08,382 --> 00:38:12,549 121 millionaires, and they all signed my petition. 615 00:38:13,903 --> 00:38:17,064 And one of the top ten constitutional attorneys 616 00:38:17,064 --> 00:38:20,897 in the United States calls Iris Glen her home. 617 00:38:21,837 --> 00:38:25,184 When my daughter, Nevada and I accompanied my husband 618 00:38:25,184 --> 00:38:29,184 to a dental convention in 2000 in Washington DC, 619 00:38:30,300 --> 00:38:31,967 my world was rocked. 620 00:38:34,024 --> 00:38:37,901 We visited quite a few historical monuments. 621 00:38:37,901 --> 00:38:42,157 But what took my breath away, was when we took in 622 00:38:42,157 --> 00:38:43,990 the National Archives. 623 00:38:45,820 --> 00:38:49,624 This is where the original Declaration of Independence 624 00:38:49,624 --> 00:38:52,917 and Bill of Rights holds sway. 625 00:38:52,917 --> 00:38:56,824 Every elected official should be compelled by law 626 00:38:56,824 --> 00:38:59,664 to make a pilgrimage to the National Archives 627 00:38:59,664 --> 00:39:03,831 once a week (laughing) at a bear minimum. 628 00:39:06,237 --> 00:39:08,654 As a reminder, as a reminder. 629 00:39:13,890 --> 00:39:16,490 Parchment that changed the world. 630 00:39:16,490 --> 00:39:18,740 (applause) 631 00:39:22,130 --> 00:39:25,290 So here's what I proposed to do. 632 00:39:25,290 --> 00:39:29,837 My first act as Mayor will be to impose term limits. 633 00:39:29,837 --> 00:39:33,340 A mayor may only serve one six year term. 634 00:39:33,340 --> 00:39:36,530 And the very first victim of term limits will be me. 635 00:39:36,530 --> 00:39:39,090 In six years I'm through. 636 00:39:39,090 --> 00:39:42,090 I have lofty goals to put it mildly. 637 00:39:43,074 --> 00:39:46,770 But six years is plenty of time to achieve most of them. 638 00:39:46,770 --> 00:39:51,744 Or to fail, six years is plenty of time to rise to 639 00:39:51,744 --> 00:39:55,911 a challenge, not dilly dally campaigning for re-election. 640 00:39:58,943 --> 00:40:02,875 Next, in a recent poll it was determined that 82% 641 00:40:02,875 --> 00:40:07,042 of the adult population of Iris Glen do not smoke. 642 00:40:08,250 --> 00:40:10,583 Disposal of cigarette butts. 643 00:40:11,744 --> 00:40:15,062 It's littering, it's disgusting and you're going to 644 00:40:15,062 --> 00:40:17,170 jail for 72 hours. 645 00:40:17,170 --> 00:40:19,850 (applause) 646 00:40:19,850 --> 00:40:20,877 (hollering) 647 00:40:20,877 --> 00:40:24,169 Oh right on 18 percenter because I'm gonna get it passed. 648 00:40:24,169 --> 00:40:26,435 (laughing) 649 00:40:26,435 --> 00:40:29,528 And you'll also perform 70 hours of community service 650 00:40:29,528 --> 00:40:32,689 picking up, sweeping up, spearing trash, including 651 00:40:32,689 --> 00:40:36,106 cigarette butts after your incarceration. 652 00:40:39,329 --> 00:40:42,102 Expectorating in public. 653 00:40:42,102 --> 00:40:45,129 (audience murmuring) 654 00:40:45,129 --> 00:40:48,465 Why are baseball players always spitting? 655 00:40:48,465 --> 00:40:52,569 What is it exactly that they're spitting? 656 00:40:52,569 --> 00:40:54,915 And why can't they simply swallow? 657 00:40:54,915 --> 00:40:57,515 (laughing) 658 00:40:57,515 --> 00:40:59,169 70 hours in jail. 659 00:40:59,169 --> 00:41:00,781 (laughing) 660 00:41:00,781 --> 00:41:03,031 (applause) 661 00:41:07,781 --> 00:41:08,781 Immigration. 662 00:41:10,555 --> 00:41:12,369 Oh, that shut ya up, didn't it? 663 00:41:12,369 --> 00:41:14,619 (laughing) 664 00:41:22,835 --> 00:41:27,002 (moaning) (breathing heavily) 665 00:41:42,166 --> 00:41:45,311 - You don't have to wait when you're this excited. 666 00:41:45,311 --> 00:41:48,478 Just pull your pants down and fuck me. 667 00:41:55,675 --> 00:41:58,889 Oh ye whose dead lie buried beneath the green grass, 668 00:41:58,889 --> 00:42:01,569 who standing among flowers can say, "Here, 669 00:42:01,569 --> 00:42:03,486 "here lies my beloved." 670 00:42:04,342 --> 00:42:08,542 Ye not know the desolation that broods in bosoms like these. 671 00:42:08,542 --> 00:42:10,726 What bitter blanks than those black-bordered marbles 672 00:42:10,726 --> 00:42:13,249 which cover no ashes. 673 00:42:13,249 --> 00:42:16,993 What despair in those immovable inscriptions. 674 00:42:16,993 --> 00:42:19,009 What deadly voids and unbidden infidelities 675 00:42:19,009 --> 00:42:21,115 in the lines that seem to gnaw upon all faith 676 00:42:21,115 --> 00:42:23,529 and refuse resurrections to the beings who have been 677 00:42:23,529 --> 00:42:25,446 placed without a grave. 678 00:42:26,834 --> 00:42:29,034 As well might those tablets stand in the cave of 679 00:42:29,034 --> 00:42:30,534 Elephanta is here. 680 00:42:32,502 --> 00:42:35,275 - [Otto] So, you're telling me I should ignore the fact 681 00:42:35,275 --> 00:42:37,849 that your neighbor is looking at my Johnson? 682 00:42:37,849 --> 00:42:40,822 - Baby I'm reading Melville. 683 00:42:40,822 --> 00:42:42,969 - What's his deal, Nevada? 684 00:42:42,969 --> 00:42:45,794 - I don't know, he represents the sum total of 685 00:42:45,794 --> 00:42:48,302 Iris Glen's unemployment rate. 686 00:42:48,302 --> 00:42:50,222 He won a wheelbarrow full of lottery money, 687 00:42:50,222 --> 00:42:53,075 so he doesn't have a job. 688 00:42:53,075 --> 00:42:54,809 He's our talisman. 689 00:42:54,809 --> 00:42:55,976 Our protector. 690 00:42:57,635 --> 00:42:59,462 My mom says she's actually glad he's there so she 691 00:42:59,462 --> 00:43:01,849 can keep an eye on him. 692 00:43:01,849 --> 00:43:03,889 - Have you ever met him? 693 00:43:03,889 --> 00:43:06,222 - None of us have. 694 00:43:06,222 --> 00:43:09,033 Maybe my baby sister once. 695 00:43:09,033 --> 00:43:10,902 - Why do you say that? 696 00:43:10,902 --> 00:43:12,069 - Sixth sense. 697 00:43:14,822 --> 00:43:18,889 My dad's in prison, please don't look up what he did. 698 00:43:18,889 --> 00:43:20,952 - I know he's in prison. 699 00:43:20,952 --> 00:43:23,952 And why, and I know who your mom is. 700 00:43:27,969 --> 00:43:30,222 I'm really crowding you, huh? 701 00:43:30,222 --> 00:43:32,209 - Promise me you won't tell anyone? 702 00:43:32,209 --> 00:43:34,235 Your friends, your family? 703 00:43:34,235 --> 00:43:35,755 Who I am? 704 00:43:35,755 --> 00:43:37,172 Who my mother is? 705 00:43:46,435 --> 00:43:47,929 - [Darlene] So how are you gonna introduce me to Otto 706 00:43:47,929 --> 00:43:50,048 when he gets here? 707 00:43:50,048 --> 00:43:52,915 - [Nevada] How about Otto, meet my best friend, Darlene. 708 00:43:52,915 --> 00:43:55,180 Who was once my babysitter and who cruelly left 709 00:43:55,180 --> 00:43:59,347 my beautiful baby godson home today with his grandmother. 710 00:44:00,262 --> 00:44:01,702 I love that kid. 711 00:44:01,702 --> 00:44:03,119 - You're so mean. 712 00:44:04,496 --> 00:44:07,699 I'm so jealous of older couples who are so openly 713 00:44:07,699 --> 00:44:09,016 affectionate with one another. 714 00:44:09,016 --> 00:44:11,849 So clearly, spectacularly in love. 715 00:44:13,322 --> 00:44:14,645 - You think that's because they're getting older 716 00:44:14,645 --> 00:44:17,844 or because you're presently single? 717 00:44:17,844 --> 00:44:19,325 - I have to lower my standards. 718 00:44:19,325 --> 00:44:20,735 I have to stop being superficial. 719 00:44:20,735 --> 00:44:24,125 I would never date someone named Otto, for example. 720 00:44:24,125 --> 00:44:27,008 (laughing) 721 00:44:27,008 --> 00:44:28,699 I can't wait to get older so I can do things like that 722 00:44:28,699 --> 00:44:32,116 and people, young people like me jealous. 723 00:44:33,462 --> 00:44:36,179 Does Otto have any discernible flaws? 724 00:44:36,179 --> 00:44:38,725 - He doesn't know how to say guacamole. 725 00:44:38,725 --> 00:44:40,939 He pronounces it guaca-mole. 726 00:44:40,939 --> 00:44:44,459 I think he thinks that's how it's actually pronounced. 727 00:44:44,459 --> 00:44:46,292 - Uh-huh, correct him. 728 00:44:47,295 --> 00:44:49,949 - I think it's adorable. 729 00:44:49,949 --> 00:44:54,116 He's a great lover, see how I just cut to the chase there? 730 00:44:55,442 --> 00:44:57,949 We're both creatures of habit. 731 00:44:57,949 --> 00:45:00,295 We only eat baked salmon for lunch. 732 00:45:00,295 --> 00:45:02,482 We only drink kale and fruit smoothies. 733 00:45:02,482 --> 00:45:03,315 - Only? 734 00:45:03,315 --> 00:45:06,212 - Neither of us particularly like to eat dinner. 735 00:45:06,212 --> 00:45:08,173 - That's crazy, aren't you hungry when you wake up 736 00:45:08,173 --> 00:45:09,295 in the morning? 737 00:45:09,295 --> 00:45:11,429 - Yeah, I eat breakfast. 738 00:45:11,429 --> 00:45:13,949 We both eat big breakfasts. 739 00:45:13,949 --> 00:45:18,116 We both like taking walks through Times Square, five AM. 740 00:45:19,655 --> 00:45:21,189 Between five and six in the morning, 741 00:45:21,189 --> 00:45:23,375 we own that town. 742 00:45:23,375 --> 00:45:25,228 - [Darlene] Does Harper like him? 743 00:45:25,228 --> 00:45:27,122 - He punched me in the stomach. 744 00:45:27,122 --> 00:45:29,282 - That only means you punched him in the stomach first. 745 00:45:29,282 --> 00:45:32,255 You have become so predictable. 746 00:45:32,255 --> 00:45:33,882 Does Harper like him? 747 00:45:33,882 --> 00:45:37,375 - I don't even know she likes you, babe. 748 00:45:37,375 --> 00:45:39,282 Since I met Otto, I've been obsessing 749 00:45:39,282 --> 00:45:41,989 about palindromic names. 750 00:45:41,989 --> 00:45:43,322 Anna, Ava, Anna. 751 00:45:47,135 --> 00:45:48,655 (laughing) 752 00:45:48,655 --> 00:45:49,895 - Good. 753 00:45:49,895 --> 00:45:52,615 - He says the oddest things. 754 00:45:52,615 --> 00:45:55,747 Once he asked me if I thought there was a finite 755 00:45:55,747 --> 00:45:57,452 number of songs that could be written, 756 00:45:57,452 --> 00:46:00,095 since there are only so many musical notes. 757 00:46:00,095 --> 00:46:03,095 - [Darlene] Are there, only so many? 758 00:46:04,233 --> 00:46:08,055 - It made me wonder if that was true with people, too. 759 00:46:08,055 --> 00:46:11,305 Only a finite number of people allowed. 760 00:46:12,162 --> 00:46:12,995 - Huh? 761 00:46:15,509 --> 00:46:17,962 Maybe he thinks he's just another transitional 762 00:46:17,962 --> 00:46:19,629 relationship to you. 763 00:46:21,586 --> 00:46:23,602 Like a snowflake that'll dissolve the moment 764 00:46:23,602 --> 00:46:25,468 you turn your face away from his. 765 00:46:25,468 --> 00:46:27,629 - That's horrible. 766 00:46:27,629 --> 00:46:29,905 Anyway, you just answered the question. 767 00:46:29,905 --> 00:46:31,720 Every snowflake is different. 768 00:46:31,720 --> 00:46:33,137 So is every song. 769 00:46:35,149 --> 00:46:36,732 So is every person. 770 00:46:37,802 --> 00:46:40,922 - I still daydream, radiant daydreams. 771 00:46:40,922 --> 00:46:42,802 I love your mom for that. 772 00:46:42,802 --> 00:46:45,322 You never stop dreaming no matter how old you become. 773 00:46:45,322 --> 00:46:48,201 There's still so much I want to do. 774 00:46:48,201 --> 00:46:51,133 The trouble is, with each passing year with each 775 00:46:51,133 --> 00:46:53,818 new kid, I become frustrated so the only thing I do 776 00:46:53,818 --> 00:46:57,295 about my dreams is contract new ones. 777 00:46:57,295 --> 00:46:58,922 How did you become a babysitter? 778 00:46:58,922 --> 00:47:01,135 Or why did you become a babysitter? 779 00:47:01,135 --> 00:47:03,799 - That might be the oddest segway I've ever heard. 780 00:47:03,799 --> 00:47:06,682 - Oh, nothing if not odd, just ask my kids. 781 00:47:06,682 --> 00:47:07,569 - Hey. 782 00:47:07,569 --> 00:47:08,402 - Hi. 783 00:47:11,242 --> 00:47:13,149 Darlene, this is Otto, my boyfriend. 784 00:47:13,149 --> 00:47:13,982 - Hi. 785 00:47:13,982 --> 00:47:14,815 - Hi. 786 00:47:14,815 --> 00:47:16,148 - No Otto jokes? 787 00:47:16,989 --> 00:47:17,869 Nice to meet you. 788 00:47:17,869 --> 00:47:19,789 - Nice to meet you, too. 789 00:47:19,789 --> 00:47:21,389 - Oh, honey, about tomorrow. 790 00:47:21,389 --> 00:47:23,882 I'm going to visit my Grandma, Julianne. 791 00:47:23,882 --> 00:47:26,052 - Oh hey, how did her Seder go? 792 00:47:26,052 --> 00:47:28,055 - Your grandmother is Jewish? 793 00:47:28,055 --> 00:47:29,555 - Honorary Jewish. 794 00:47:30,429 --> 00:47:33,613 What can I say, she craves Gefilte fish. 795 00:47:33,613 --> 00:47:35,628 She's the traditional sort of gal. 796 00:47:35,628 --> 00:47:37,789 Her best friend growing up was Jewish, 797 00:47:37,789 --> 00:47:39,492 so when the friend went to live in Israel 798 00:47:39,492 --> 00:47:42,677 on a Kibbutz, so did Grandma. 799 00:47:42,677 --> 00:47:47,502 That inculcated the concept of paradigms in Grandma. 800 00:47:47,502 --> 00:47:50,812 I'm certain that's how it took root in my mom. 801 00:47:50,812 --> 00:47:53,305 My mom was actually born in Israel. 802 00:47:53,305 --> 00:47:56,305 In Haifa, technically she's Israeli. 803 00:47:57,557 --> 00:48:00,807 I don't know how she keeps it a secret. 804 00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:04,479 Grandma even enlisted in the Israeli army. 805 00:48:04,479 --> 00:48:08,092 Her best friend, it was compulsory for her best friend. 806 00:48:08,092 --> 00:48:10,259 And they were inseparable. 807 00:48:11,543 --> 00:48:12,543 Inseparable. 808 00:48:13,464 --> 00:48:15,519 - But she's not Jewish? 809 00:48:15,519 --> 00:48:18,424 - The Army stent is when she took up archery. 810 00:48:18,424 --> 00:48:20,279 She was so good she was recruited to train with 811 00:48:20,279 --> 00:48:22,503 the Israeli Olympic archery team. 812 00:48:22,503 --> 00:48:25,891 But uh, she was retrieving her arrows one day 813 00:48:25,891 --> 00:48:29,974 on the range and one of her eyes, she was blinded 814 00:48:31,399 --> 00:48:33,066 in a freak accident. 815 00:48:35,132 --> 00:48:36,559 Her cornea was sliced open by the 816 00:48:36,559 --> 00:48:39,392 fletching of someone else's arrow. 817 00:48:40,385 --> 00:48:43,135 In the end I guess she was lucky. 818 00:48:44,104 --> 00:48:48,185 But now even still, she goes to the range once a week, 819 00:48:48,185 --> 00:48:49,102 every week. 820 00:48:50,583 --> 00:48:53,416 She's not intimidated by anything. 821 00:48:54,865 --> 00:48:57,119 Stubborn fake Jew. 822 00:48:57,119 --> 00:48:58,865 (dog barking) 823 00:48:58,865 --> 00:49:00,282 My family's nuts. 824 00:49:06,572 --> 00:49:08,252 - You're insane. 825 00:49:08,252 --> 00:49:12,419 Harper, you have breast cancer, aggressive breast cancer. 826 00:49:13,372 --> 00:49:15,812 That's debilitating enough, but you're also opting 827 00:49:15,812 --> 00:49:18,063 for a double mastectomy. 828 00:49:18,063 --> 00:49:19,799 Take a break. 829 00:49:19,799 --> 00:49:23,199 - No, I need you to help me draft the constitution 830 00:49:23,199 --> 00:49:26,105 and I need you to spearhead the flat tax section. 831 00:49:26,105 --> 00:49:28,065 You can work with George on that. 832 00:49:28,065 --> 00:49:29,679 - What's the final number? 833 00:49:29,679 --> 00:49:31,692 - [Harper] 46.2%. 834 00:49:31,692 --> 00:49:32,596 - [Lou] Margin of error? 835 00:49:32,596 --> 00:49:33,513 - .2%. 836 00:49:34,359 --> 00:49:36,318 - I can sell that. 837 00:49:36,318 --> 00:49:38,768 (chuckles) What am I saying? 838 00:49:38,768 --> 00:49:41,092 - [Harper] How soon can you meet with George? 839 00:49:41,092 --> 00:49:41,925 - Harper, 840 00:49:44,679 --> 00:49:47,012 after I remove your breasts. 841 00:49:48,785 --> 00:49:52,082 - I've got four more years to get so much done. 842 00:49:52,082 --> 00:49:55,082 Realistically, am I being realistic? 843 00:49:57,892 --> 00:49:58,725 Lou? 844 00:50:00,518 --> 00:50:03,089 - A year ago you were fairly adamant about not taking 845 00:50:03,089 --> 00:50:05,929 the time off from work for a second surgery if you 846 00:50:05,929 --> 00:50:08,846 needed a mastectomy, what happened? 847 00:50:11,942 --> 00:50:13,109 That's coffee. 848 00:50:14,342 --> 00:50:16,259 - The ice cube's water. 849 00:50:18,073 --> 00:50:19,355 - I'll get you a hand towel. 850 00:50:19,355 --> 00:50:20,188 - No. 851 00:50:26,182 --> 00:50:28,765 (gentle music) 852 00:51:10,765 --> 00:51:13,098 (chuckling) 853 00:51:14,872 --> 00:51:16,455 - I'm very nervous. 854 00:51:18,939 --> 00:51:20,022 - About what? 855 00:51:27,725 --> 00:51:32,084 - It's kind of nice and kinda of weird that neither of us 856 00:51:32,084 --> 00:51:36,084 have names that can be shortened into nicknames. 857 00:51:38,539 --> 00:51:41,485 Have you told anyone about me? 858 00:51:41,485 --> 00:51:42,568 About my mom? 859 00:51:44,925 --> 00:51:49,092 - [Otto] No, but I really want to (chuckling). 860 00:51:50,005 --> 00:51:52,699 - I knew I could trust you. 861 00:51:52,699 --> 00:51:54,870 I've always said that the fastest way to spread gossip 862 00:51:54,870 --> 00:51:58,370 is just swear your best friend to secrecy. 863 00:52:02,072 --> 00:52:02,905 Okay. 864 00:52:07,003 --> 00:52:09,586 You want to hear an epic story? 865 00:52:11,559 --> 00:52:12,809 - Who wouldn't? 866 00:52:14,445 --> 00:52:17,485 - You can't unhear it once I tell it. 867 00:52:17,485 --> 00:52:18,912 And you're going to want to break up with me 868 00:52:18,912 --> 00:52:20,245 once I tell you, 869 00:52:22,217 --> 00:52:24,634 but it's a pretty epic story. 870 00:52:28,619 --> 00:52:30,576 - [Harper] Nevada? 871 00:52:30,576 --> 00:52:31,826 - In here, Mom. 872 00:52:34,605 --> 00:52:36,405 - Why are you reading in here honey? 873 00:52:36,405 --> 00:52:37,939 - The bulb in my room blew and I don't like reading 874 00:52:37,939 --> 00:52:40,606 downstairs next to the scary TV. 875 00:52:42,643 --> 00:52:44,485 When my sister was born, I would spy on my mother 876 00:52:44,485 --> 00:52:46,965 while she watched her sleeping. 877 00:52:46,965 --> 00:52:48,678 I've never seen that singular look of love 878 00:52:48,678 --> 00:52:50,752 on anyone's face since. 879 00:52:50,752 --> 00:52:52,419 So pure, so intense. 880 00:52:53,659 --> 00:52:54,819 - [Otto] Were you jealous? 881 00:52:54,819 --> 00:52:55,652 - Sure. 882 00:52:57,272 --> 00:52:59,979 That's some smile, Mom. 883 00:52:59,979 --> 00:53:02,179 - I'm going to Washington, honey. 884 00:53:02,179 --> 00:53:06,346 Friday, I finally got a meeting with one of the supremes. 885 00:53:07,724 --> 00:53:09,659 Ah, it's starting. 886 00:53:09,659 --> 00:53:11,076 - That's amazing. 887 00:53:12,259 --> 00:53:14,762 I love that smile, Mom, I thought you retired that smile 888 00:53:14,762 --> 00:53:16,803 when Uncle Calvin died. 889 00:53:16,803 --> 00:53:19,870 - Oh honey, when you love someone so much, 890 00:53:19,870 --> 00:53:22,739 you should always be smiling like this. 891 00:53:22,739 --> 00:53:26,738 I remember exactly when it was that I first started 892 00:53:26,738 --> 00:53:30,005 loving Uncle Calvin so much that I couldn't stop 893 00:53:30,005 --> 00:53:31,505 smiling like this. 894 00:53:34,379 --> 00:53:35,212 I was 17. 895 00:53:37,525 --> 00:53:39,525 I had a best girlfriend. 896 00:53:41,779 --> 00:53:43,112 She was a rebel. 897 00:53:44,885 --> 00:53:46,752 I idolized her. 898 00:53:46,752 --> 00:53:49,002 Ah, she was a great dancer. 899 00:53:50,592 --> 00:53:53,962 She knew how to buy the coolest clothes from the vintage 900 00:53:53,962 --> 00:53:57,165 shops and she knew where they all were everywhere. 901 00:53:57,165 --> 00:53:59,045 Like the people who know where all the best antique 902 00:53:59,045 --> 00:53:59,962 stores are. 903 00:54:01,432 --> 00:54:04,179 She got straight A's and she never did her homework. 904 00:54:04,179 --> 00:54:05,819 She wouldn't wear a bra. 905 00:54:05,819 --> 00:54:07,352 - Bet she wears one now. 906 00:54:07,352 --> 00:54:08,519 - Oh shush up. 907 00:54:09,378 --> 00:54:11,432 I owned my own car. 908 00:54:11,432 --> 00:54:14,192 I bought it with my own money, too. 909 00:54:14,192 --> 00:54:16,795 So, after graduation from high school, 910 00:54:16,795 --> 00:54:19,365 she decided that we should drive to a music festival 911 00:54:19,365 --> 00:54:23,725 in Austin, Texas together on holiday, just the two of us. 912 00:54:23,725 --> 00:54:27,564 There was nothing she could suggest that I wouldn't do. 913 00:54:27,564 --> 00:54:30,699 So we decided to drive through Salt Lake City 914 00:54:30,699 --> 00:54:34,485 so we could see the great Salt Lake, and that's where 915 00:54:34,485 --> 00:54:38,125 she met this guy, this Mormon guy. 916 00:54:38,125 --> 00:54:40,042 She ditched me for him. 917 00:54:41,712 --> 00:54:45,879 Well, defiantly I decided to drive on to Austin alone. 918 00:54:46,735 --> 00:54:49,139 I got just outside of Grand Junction, Colorado 919 00:54:49,139 --> 00:54:51,362 and my car overheated. 920 00:54:51,362 --> 00:54:54,979 And I freaked out because I knew nothing about cars. 921 00:54:54,979 --> 00:54:58,312 So without thinking I did a u-turn, drove back to 922 00:54:58,312 --> 00:55:01,895 Grand Junction, checked into a Holiday Inn, 923 00:55:03,805 --> 00:55:07,972 at noon I bought a six pack of beer with my phony ID. 924 00:55:09,949 --> 00:55:14,099 I bought a six pack of beer, I brought it back to my room 925 00:55:14,099 --> 00:55:17,045 and had a nervous breakdown. 926 00:55:17,045 --> 00:55:20,545 I never cried so hard, so long in my life. 927 00:55:21,699 --> 00:55:23,699 I fell completely apart. 928 00:55:24,603 --> 00:55:27,232 And so I did the only thing I could do. 929 00:55:27,232 --> 00:55:29,805 I called Grandma, but she wasn't home. 930 00:55:29,805 --> 00:55:31,555 Only Calvin was home. 931 00:55:32,432 --> 00:55:34,392 Remember, he lived in Argentina. 932 00:55:34,392 --> 00:55:36,445 Worked for (speaking in foreign language). 933 00:55:36,445 --> 00:55:38,645 You even wrote that story, fiction, 934 00:55:38,645 --> 00:55:41,911 about him being a Nazi in exile. 935 00:55:41,911 --> 00:55:44,845 He played along with his great niece. 936 00:55:44,845 --> 00:55:48,245 Providing you with elaborate fake details. 937 00:55:48,245 --> 00:55:51,328 And he had that adorable fake accent. 938 00:55:52,482 --> 00:55:56,084 Anyway, he just arrived in New York, 939 00:55:56,084 --> 00:55:57,963 and he made it to the phone just in time, 940 00:55:57,963 --> 00:56:00,443 a split second before I was going to hang up 941 00:56:00,443 --> 00:56:02,026 and slit my wrists. 942 00:56:03,070 --> 00:56:07,216 While I couldn't stop crying, but I got my whole story out 943 00:56:07,216 --> 00:56:08,962 and ended by telling him that I was 944 00:56:08,962 --> 00:56:12,901 moving to Grand Junction for the rest of my life 945 00:56:12,901 --> 00:56:15,843 because my car didn't work and I couldn't face 946 00:56:15,843 --> 00:56:17,510 coming home a loser. 947 00:56:19,443 --> 00:56:22,230 He talked me off the ledge and he told me to get a 948 00:56:22,230 --> 00:56:23,813 good night's sleep. 949 00:56:24,735 --> 00:56:28,496 So I ate a chocolate bar, and some cashews 950 00:56:28,496 --> 00:56:31,001 and right around the time I got through with my second 951 00:56:31,001 --> 00:56:34,168 beer the phone rang in Grand Junction. 952 00:56:35,883 --> 00:56:37,746 I almost didn't answer it. 953 00:56:37,746 --> 00:56:41,963 I didn't know a soul outside of Iris Glen. 954 00:56:41,963 --> 00:56:44,723 It was a young priest from a local parish, 955 00:56:44,723 --> 00:56:48,056 Calvin found him and asked if he would call me. 956 00:56:48,056 --> 00:56:50,416 He said that I needed a pep talk from a third party 957 00:56:50,416 --> 00:56:52,390 I could trust. 958 00:56:52,390 --> 00:56:55,390 And that young priest knew his shit. 959 00:56:56,323 --> 00:56:59,403 He gave faith to the faithless. 960 00:56:59,403 --> 00:57:01,320 That was me, faithless. 961 00:57:03,376 --> 00:57:08,161 It gave me all the courage I needed to drive home. 962 00:57:08,161 --> 00:57:12,328 And that's the first time I fell in love with Uncle Calvin. 963 00:58:38,858 --> 00:58:40,275 - Wanna break up? 964 00:58:45,618 --> 00:58:47,618 I'm the middle daughter. 965 00:58:50,338 --> 00:58:52,752 My big sister is going to win a Nobel Prize for 966 00:58:52,752 --> 00:58:54,252 medicine some day, 967 00:58:55,498 --> 00:58:59,665 and my baby sister, wow, she'll always be a super star. 968 00:59:02,564 --> 00:59:05,445 And my father's dead to me. 969 00:59:05,445 --> 00:59:06,945 - And to your mom. 970 00:59:09,352 --> 00:59:12,019 - If you want me to stop I will. 971 00:59:17,592 --> 00:59:19,592 - You're cheating on me. 972 00:59:25,017 --> 00:59:28,017 How can I be jealous of your mother? 973 00:59:31,072 --> 00:59:32,739 What kind of threat? 974 00:59:39,885 --> 00:59:40,802 Never mind. 975 00:59:48,912 --> 00:59:50,662 I'm in love with you. 976 00:59:55,965 --> 00:59:58,548 - You'll still make love to me? 977 00:59:59,858 --> 01:00:00,691 - Yes. 978 01:00:02,218 --> 01:00:04,135 - It wasn't a question. 979 01:00:09,645 --> 01:00:11,228 I love you so much. 980 01:00:15,018 --> 01:00:17,018 There is something else. 981 01:00:19,445 --> 01:00:21,778 My mother has breast cancer. 982 01:00:22,898 --> 01:00:26,298 She's having a double mastectomy on Saturday, 983 01:00:26,298 --> 01:00:31,005 and after that she's having breast reconstruction. 984 01:00:31,005 --> 01:00:34,422 And then she's going to change the world. 985 01:00:38,431 --> 01:00:39,598 - Immigration. 986 01:00:41,085 --> 01:00:43,043 Oh, that shut you up, didn't it? 987 01:00:43,043 --> 01:00:44,978 (laughing) 988 01:00:44,978 --> 01:00:47,032 I'll get back to immigration later. 989 01:00:47,032 --> 01:00:50,298 We're gonna raise taxes, or they're going through 990 01:00:50,298 --> 01:00:54,312 the roof and we're also switching to a flat income tax, 991 01:00:54,312 --> 01:00:57,202 and sales taxes will be raised. 992 01:00:57,202 --> 01:00:58,978 But there's an upside. 993 01:00:58,978 --> 01:01:01,792 Healthcare will be free. 994 01:01:01,792 --> 01:01:04,042 (applause) 995 01:01:08,550 --> 01:01:10,992 Now we don't have a four year school within our city 996 01:01:10,992 --> 01:01:14,898 limits, but any child who wants an associate's degree 997 01:01:14,898 --> 01:01:18,231 from IGCC will be admitted tuition free. 998 01:01:19,125 --> 01:01:21,375 (applause) 999 01:01:24,658 --> 01:01:26,698 And we'll create a scholarship fun for transfers 1000 01:01:26,698 --> 01:01:28,448 to four year schools. 1001 01:01:29,405 --> 01:01:33,572 Four months of paid maternity leave will be guaranteed. 1002 01:01:34,792 --> 01:01:37,883 And serious consideration will be given to some amount 1003 01:01:37,883 --> 01:01:40,216 of paternity leave, as well. 1004 01:01:41,818 --> 01:01:44,485 I want all drugs decriminalized, 1005 01:01:46,005 --> 01:01:48,422 legislated and heavily taxed. 1006 01:01:49,631 --> 01:01:52,605 Taxes raised from the legal sale of drugs will be 1007 01:01:52,605 --> 01:01:56,883 plowed into addiction therapy and mental health needs. 1008 01:01:56,883 --> 01:01:59,085 I have to determine how to handle the traffic 1009 01:01:59,085 --> 01:02:01,058 nightmare that will occur as a result. 1010 01:02:01,058 --> 01:02:02,552 (laughing) 1011 01:02:02,552 --> 01:02:03,816 But we'll figure it out. 1012 01:02:03,816 --> 01:02:05,751 (laughing) 1013 01:02:05,751 --> 01:02:08,002 Probably restrict the hours of vending drugs, 1014 01:02:08,002 --> 01:02:09,669 maybe the days, too. 1015 01:02:16,032 --> 01:02:19,699 The penalty for rape will be life in prison. 1016 01:02:20,778 --> 01:02:22,112 Without parole. 1017 01:02:22,112 --> 01:02:24,362 (applause) 1018 01:02:29,698 --> 01:02:33,138 There are six cemeteries and two golf courses 1019 01:02:33,138 --> 01:02:35,055 within our city limits. 1020 01:02:36,378 --> 01:02:40,323 They sit on some of our most fertile land 1021 01:02:40,323 --> 01:02:44,125 and reside on tracks of Iris Glen that could otherwise 1022 01:02:44,125 --> 01:02:48,042 be allocated for six thousand living, breathing 1023 01:02:49,485 --> 01:02:52,735 productive citizens, sorry sports fans. 1024 01:02:53,698 --> 01:02:56,992 But cemeteries and golf courses make no logical sense 1025 01:02:56,992 --> 01:03:00,325 to me, and I'm going to look into closing our local 1026 01:03:00,325 --> 01:03:03,552 post office and building a fourth hospital. 1027 01:03:03,552 --> 01:03:06,538 We desperately need a new hospital. 1028 01:03:06,538 --> 01:03:10,832 School pledges of allegiance will bite the dust. 1029 01:03:10,832 --> 01:03:13,445 As will swearing on a Bible in a court of law. 1030 01:03:13,445 --> 01:03:16,818 These are both fascist, controlling practices, 1031 01:03:16,818 --> 01:03:20,738 antithetical to free speech, and freedom of thought. 1032 01:03:20,738 --> 01:03:24,445 And freedom of religion and freedom from religion. 1033 01:03:24,445 --> 01:03:26,695 (applause) 1034 01:03:34,938 --> 01:03:37,355 Oh that's right, immigration. 1035 01:03:38,685 --> 01:03:41,752 Everyone is going to want to live here once all of this 1036 01:03:41,752 --> 01:03:44,152 and so much more is accomplished. 1037 01:03:44,152 --> 01:03:47,110 If you want to make Iris Glen your new home, 1038 01:03:47,110 --> 01:03:51,429 you'll have to deposit $400,000 into a local bank 1039 01:03:51,429 --> 01:03:55,032 and leave it there untouched for no less than five years. 1040 01:03:55,032 --> 01:03:57,632 We are not creating a welfare state. 1041 01:03:57,632 --> 01:03:59,882 (applause) 1042 01:04:05,232 --> 01:04:08,461 We don't want nor do we need federal assistance. 1043 01:04:08,461 --> 01:04:11,085 No federal roads or highways currently 1044 01:04:11,085 --> 01:04:12,918 run through Iris Glen. 1045 01:04:20,165 --> 01:04:23,832 I had a lot of time to look ahead in prison, 1046 01:04:25,432 --> 01:04:29,182 to consider the direction humanity is headed. 1047 01:04:30,884 --> 01:04:35,051 Global warming may not ebb, despite mankind's best efforts. 1048 01:04:37,456 --> 01:04:41,176 If left unchecked, the world's population will double 1049 01:04:41,176 --> 01:04:42,509 within 20 years. 1050 01:04:43,818 --> 01:04:46,235 Our food supply is drying up. 1051 01:04:47,645 --> 01:04:50,145 Our water supply is drying up. 1052 01:04:51,417 --> 01:04:53,912 And so is our energy. 1053 01:04:53,912 --> 01:04:56,912 Cyber terrorist will become endemic. 1054 01:05:00,015 --> 01:05:00,932 My friends, 1055 01:05:04,978 --> 01:05:08,061 Iris Glen is going to secede from the 1056 01:05:09,364 --> 01:05:11,565 United States of America. 1057 01:05:11,565 --> 01:05:13,815 (applause) 1058 01:05:20,418 --> 01:05:21,938 (knocking) 1059 01:05:21,938 --> 01:05:23,105 - Door's open. 1060 01:05:24,738 --> 01:05:25,698 Where were you? 1061 01:05:25,698 --> 01:05:27,312 You're late. 1062 01:05:27,312 --> 01:05:28,832 You said you'd be back by four. 1063 01:05:28,832 --> 01:05:31,232 - Stuff for Nova, and for your mom. 1064 01:05:31,232 --> 01:05:33,565 - Aw, you're cute. 1065 01:05:33,565 --> 01:05:36,219 - Mom's gonna love your eyeball's out for that. 1066 01:05:36,219 --> 01:05:37,472 What about bagels? 1067 01:05:37,472 --> 01:05:41,499 - Everything bagels, spinach, kale, coconut water, 1068 01:05:41,499 --> 01:05:44,085 banana, mango smoothies. 1069 01:05:44,085 --> 01:05:46,585 - I'm gonna love you for that. 1070 01:05:50,259 --> 01:05:53,092 (breathing heavy) 1071 01:05:54,752 --> 01:05:58,705 Going down on you makes me feel sad sometimes. 1072 01:05:58,705 --> 01:06:00,412 Your penis is so pretty but I can't see it 1073 01:06:00,412 --> 01:06:03,662 or watch it when I'm going down on you. 1074 01:06:04,997 --> 01:06:08,164 But I know how good it makes you feel. 1075 01:06:10,052 --> 01:06:12,211 - You can open your eyes. 1076 01:06:12,211 --> 01:06:14,044 - [Nevada] I'm myopic. 1077 01:06:21,305 --> 01:06:22,919 When I'm that close it's out of focus, 1078 01:06:22,919 --> 01:06:25,502 and it isn't beautiful anymore. 1079 01:06:32,585 --> 01:06:34,025 I love that you let me kiss you on the lips when 1080 01:06:34,025 --> 01:06:35,275 I'm doing this. 1081 01:06:36,172 --> 01:06:37,625 - [Otto] Are you kidding me? 1082 01:06:37,625 --> 01:06:39,264 Your lips taste like raspberry yogurt after 1083 01:06:39,264 --> 01:06:41,292 I cum in your mouth. 1084 01:06:41,292 --> 01:06:42,959 - That's disgusting. 1085 01:06:45,995 --> 01:06:48,662 (lips slurping) 1086 01:06:52,833 --> 01:06:55,083 (laughing) 1087 01:07:10,618 --> 01:07:14,462 I'm thinking of cutting my hair short. 1088 01:07:14,462 --> 01:07:15,927 - Why? 1089 01:07:15,927 --> 01:07:18,195 Jesus Christ, why? 1090 01:07:18,195 --> 01:07:20,609 Because you no longer feel it's necessary to look 1091 01:07:20,609 --> 01:07:22,287 attractive to men? 1092 01:07:22,287 --> 01:07:25,315 You just don't want to attract men at all anymore? 1093 01:07:25,315 --> 01:07:27,245 Because that's one sure way not to. 1094 01:07:27,245 --> 01:07:30,727 Because some married movie star did it for her husband. 1095 01:07:30,727 --> 01:07:32,609 Maybe your hairdresser suggested it. 1096 01:07:32,609 --> 01:07:34,609 Or maybe just because it's summer. 1097 01:07:34,609 --> 01:07:37,209 Old women cut their hair short. 1098 01:07:37,209 --> 01:07:38,969 Oops, there it goes. 1099 01:07:38,969 --> 01:07:40,687 There goes your sex appeal. 1100 01:07:40,687 --> 01:07:43,382 You've got a boyfriend now, it's time for a haircut. 1101 01:07:43,382 --> 01:07:47,409 What a cliche, you're daring me to say no don't cut it. 1102 01:07:47,409 --> 01:07:48,475 Is it a test? 1103 01:07:48,475 --> 01:07:50,062 A loyalty test? 1104 01:07:50,062 --> 01:07:51,979 Okay, no, don't cut it. 1105 01:07:53,232 --> 01:07:54,065 Ah. 1106 01:07:56,689 --> 01:07:57,939 - Are you done? 1107 01:07:59,395 --> 01:08:02,395 (breathing heavily) 1108 01:08:29,422 --> 01:08:33,589 - How old were you when you learned how to do this? 1109 01:08:38,302 --> 01:08:40,713 - One terrible day. 1110 01:08:40,713 --> 01:08:44,849 I was 20, and the guy said I did it so well 1111 01:08:44,849 --> 01:08:47,702 that he took me to a bar afterwards to celebrate 1112 01:08:47,702 --> 01:08:52,595 and they wouldn't serve me because I was under age. 1113 01:08:52,595 --> 01:08:55,678 So he dumped me out of embarrassment. 1114 01:08:56,515 --> 01:08:59,015 Such a piece of human garbage. 1115 01:09:03,182 --> 01:09:07,288 - I never feel like a grown up when I'm having sex. 1116 01:09:07,288 --> 01:09:08,555 I always feel like a little kid who's 1117 01:09:08,555 --> 01:09:10,888 getting away with something. 1118 01:09:11,846 --> 01:09:13,263 Like shoplifting. 1119 01:09:14,195 --> 01:09:16,289 (laughing) 1120 01:09:16,289 --> 01:09:17,289 - Thank you. 1121 01:09:21,022 --> 01:09:22,769 My last babysitter was the one who taught me how to 1122 01:09:22,769 --> 01:09:24,019 give blow jobs. 1123 01:09:28,635 --> 01:09:31,355 - You were sexually abused? 1124 01:09:31,355 --> 01:09:34,129 - My babysitter was a girl. 1125 01:09:34,129 --> 01:09:37,675 She brought her boyfriend over and had me watch. 1126 01:09:37,675 --> 01:09:40,175 Still think it's sexual abuse? 1127 01:09:42,155 --> 01:09:43,155 - Well, yes. 1128 01:09:47,235 --> 01:09:50,318 - And how's that working out for you? 1129 01:09:52,595 --> 01:09:54,834 (door slamming) 1130 01:09:54,834 --> 01:09:55,667 Sorry. 1131 01:09:56,864 --> 01:10:00,062 - For hitting me or for threatening to cut your hair? 1132 01:10:00,062 --> 01:10:03,166 - For leaving you like this. 1133 01:10:03,166 --> 01:10:07,262 Just change the sheets when you have a second. 1134 01:10:07,262 --> 01:10:08,095 - Why? 1135 01:10:09,062 --> 01:10:12,542 - I noticed the famous skid mark when I undressed you. 1136 01:10:12,542 --> 01:10:15,125 Maybe you farted, I don't know. 1137 01:10:16,675 --> 01:10:17,592 I love you. 1138 01:11:06,968 --> 01:11:09,582 - I want you to do me a favor. 1139 01:11:09,582 --> 01:11:14,062 I need you to speak to that lunatic across the street. 1140 01:11:14,062 --> 01:11:17,062 About a reporter, who's stalking me. 1141 01:11:18,889 --> 01:11:20,529 - That lunatic across the street probably hasn't 1142 01:11:20,529 --> 01:11:23,262 left his house since we moved in here. 1143 01:11:23,262 --> 01:11:27,169 - Exactly, it could scare the shit out of anyone. 1144 01:11:27,169 --> 01:11:29,049 You know what, forget it. 1145 01:11:29,049 --> 01:11:31,182 I don't need his pity either. 1146 01:11:31,182 --> 01:11:33,849 (door creaking) 1147 01:11:39,142 --> 01:11:41,809 (baby babbling) 1148 01:11:46,862 --> 01:11:49,115 - So you wanna break up? 1149 01:11:49,115 --> 01:11:50,302 - [Darlene] What? 1150 01:11:50,302 --> 01:11:54,129 - Nothing, that's what I asked Otto after I told him. 1151 01:11:54,129 --> 01:11:56,635 - [Darlene] Oh, so you're still seeing him? 1152 01:11:56,635 --> 01:11:58,089 - Yes. 1153 01:11:58,089 --> 01:11:58,922 - Okay. 1154 01:12:01,472 --> 01:12:04,009 - Darlene, at the library, 1155 01:12:04,009 --> 01:12:06,542 I went online and scoured the web. 1156 01:12:06,542 --> 01:12:09,049 Looking for a single instance of a positive 1157 01:12:09,049 --> 01:12:11,461 or enduring sexual relationship between a mother 1158 01:12:11,461 --> 01:12:12,878 and her daughter. 1159 01:12:14,569 --> 01:12:16,236 I couldn't find one. 1160 01:12:17,088 --> 01:12:18,142 Not a legitimate one, 1161 01:12:18,142 --> 01:12:21,725 not some porn fantasy, not a Greek tragedy, 1162 01:12:24,755 --> 01:12:26,672 and I looked for hours. 1163 01:12:28,275 --> 01:12:32,062 I actually fell asleep at the computer. 1164 01:12:32,062 --> 01:12:34,982 I woke up the next morning, 1165 01:12:34,982 --> 01:12:38,380 and the librarian just left me there sleeping. 1166 01:12:38,380 --> 01:12:41,222 Said he didn't want to wake me. 1167 01:12:41,222 --> 01:12:45,462 Made me coffee the next morning when he arrived. 1168 01:12:45,462 --> 01:12:47,545 - How guilty do you feel? 1169 01:12:49,849 --> 01:12:51,099 - I feel right. 1170 01:12:53,715 --> 01:12:55,875 - You don't feel ashamed of your mom? 1171 01:12:55,875 --> 01:12:58,835 A lot of people think she's a kook, you know? 1172 01:12:58,835 --> 01:12:59,668 - They do. 1173 01:13:02,942 --> 01:13:05,942 I'm afraid that she's ashamed of me. 1174 01:13:07,529 --> 01:13:10,315 - I think if you had told me what you were doing 1175 01:13:10,315 --> 01:13:14,755 when I was your age, I would have flipped out. 1176 01:13:14,755 --> 01:13:17,489 I would have stopped talking to you. 1177 01:13:17,489 --> 01:13:19,915 I would have turned you in. 1178 01:13:19,915 --> 01:13:22,929 Is it even against the law? 1179 01:13:22,929 --> 01:13:23,762 - No. 1180 01:13:28,049 --> 01:13:31,216 - [Darlene] I hate you for telling me. 1181 01:13:36,515 --> 01:13:38,015 - She's alone now. 1182 01:13:39,514 --> 01:13:41,264 I'm all she has left. 1183 01:13:44,209 --> 01:13:46,459 The first time it happened, 1184 01:13:47,822 --> 01:13:49,395 for the first time I completely understood 1185 01:13:49,395 --> 01:13:51,562 how my dad must have felt. 1186 01:13:53,381 --> 01:13:56,302 Wait, letting your imagination run away with you 1187 01:13:56,302 --> 01:13:58,609 can be a good thing. 1188 01:13:58,609 --> 01:14:02,026 It is a good thing, and the sex is great. 1189 01:14:03,355 --> 01:14:05,605 There, I said it, out loud. 1190 01:14:07,889 --> 01:14:09,306 And my mom's hot. 1191 01:14:10,474 --> 01:14:14,641 And she's a role model, and she's under so much pressure. 1192 01:14:16,942 --> 01:14:20,369 And she tries to help so many people. 1193 01:14:20,369 --> 01:14:22,119 And she's a survivor. 1194 01:14:24,569 --> 01:14:28,736 And one of her kids died in her arms, in her arms. 1195 01:14:33,169 --> 01:14:35,169 And if I can do anything to make her feel good, 1196 01:14:35,169 --> 01:14:37,822 physically or any other way, as her daughter 1197 01:14:37,822 --> 01:14:40,739 I have a responsibility to do that. 1198 01:14:49,005 --> 01:14:50,588 Thank you, Darlene. 1199 01:14:59,234 --> 01:15:01,102 (laughing) 1200 01:15:01,102 --> 01:15:02,726 Are you on drugs? 1201 01:15:02,726 --> 01:15:06,529 - Yes, and (mumbles) a huge handful of them. 1202 01:15:06,529 --> 01:15:08,847 They're in a cellophane pouch in my rectum. 1203 01:15:08,847 --> 01:15:10,809 - Oh, I don't believe you. 1204 01:15:10,809 --> 01:15:13,769 - Go ahead you can check for yourself. 1205 01:15:13,769 --> 01:15:15,446 (laughing) 1206 01:15:15,446 --> 01:15:16,946 - You know I will. 1207 01:15:21,275 --> 01:15:23,339 Mom, are you okay? 1208 01:15:23,339 --> 01:15:24,256 - I'm okay. 1209 01:15:29,462 --> 01:15:32,462 - Remember when I was a little girl? 1210 01:15:33,362 --> 01:15:36,729 Remember what you used to tell me when I got sick? 1211 01:15:36,729 --> 01:15:40,075 That getting sick is nature's way of making us stronger 1212 01:15:40,075 --> 01:15:42,158 and prettier and smarter. 1213 01:15:43,795 --> 01:15:45,529 You're already prettier. 1214 01:15:45,529 --> 01:15:46,362 Shh. 1215 01:16:40,289 --> 01:16:42,313 - [Dr. Ellis] Hello, Harper, sorry to keep you waiting. 1216 01:16:42,313 --> 01:16:43,609 - [Harper] No worries, Dr. Ellis. 1217 01:16:43,609 --> 01:16:46,342 I called to ask for a prescription for me. 1218 01:16:46,342 --> 01:16:48,009 For Valium, I'm out. 1219 01:16:50,019 --> 01:16:51,195 - [Dr. Ellis] No. 1220 01:16:51,195 --> 01:16:53,409 - [Harper] No, why? 1221 01:16:53,409 --> 01:16:55,127 - [Dr. Ellis] Harper, you've used hallucinogenic drugs 1222 01:16:55,127 --> 01:16:59,075 in the past five years and I don't live in Iris Glen. 1223 01:16:59,075 --> 01:17:00,782 I'll see you on Saturday, Harper. 1224 01:17:00,782 --> 01:17:04,199 (shower water splashing) 1225 01:17:35,566 --> 01:17:39,462 - Mom, stop staring at my tits you're embarrassing me. 1226 01:17:39,462 --> 01:17:42,062 - Oh, I'm embarrassing you? 1227 01:17:42,062 --> 01:17:43,715 Don't call them that. 1228 01:17:43,715 --> 01:17:46,048 - Oh is that a new law, too? 1229 01:17:52,755 --> 01:17:54,088 What's going on? 1230 01:18:01,035 --> 01:18:02,489 (hand slapping on skin) 1231 01:18:02,489 --> 01:18:04,649 - I gave you my tits! 1232 01:18:04,649 --> 01:18:06,339 I gave you my cunt! 1233 01:18:06,339 --> 01:18:08,555 I gave you my heart! 1234 01:18:08,555 --> 01:18:10,555 And now you're my ideal. 1235 01:18:14,325 --> 01:18:15,435 - Mom I know that you're-- 1236 01:18:15,435 --> 01:18:17,129 - No you don't! 1237 01:18:17,129 --> 01:18:18,212 No you don't! 1238 01:18:21,954 --> 01:18:25,371 (shower water splashing) 1239 01:18:39,502 --> 01:18:41,835 - Why don't you just speak about it that's the only way you 1240 01:18:41,835 --> 01:18:45,585 know how to communicate with people any more. 1241 01:18:49,355 --> 01:18:51,522 (sobbing) 1242 01:19:12,955 --> 01:19:17,122 - We only have an 80 gallon hot water heater ya know. 1243 01:19:33,809 --> 01:19:37,976 - [Dr. Ellis] You were telling me about turbulence. 1244 01:19:39,157 --> 01:19:41,622 - Well, it was surreal. 1245 01:19:41,622 --> 01:19:43,741 Significant turbulence. 1246 01:19:43,741 --> 01:19:46,502 You know the kind when the pilot makes that 1247 01:19:46,502 --> 01:19:50,009 sudden scary stern announcement, flight attendants 1248 01:19:50,009 --> 01:19:51,955 take your seats. 1249 01:19:51,955 --> 01:19:55,902 An entire plane full of passengers all exhibiting 1250 01:19:55,902 --> 01:19:57,902 uncontrollable laughter. 1251 01:20:01,262 --> 01:20:04,179 A dog, a dog on the plane got sick. 1252 01:20:05,273 --> 01:20:07,555 Took a dump in the aisle. 1253 01:20:07,555 --> 01:20:10,635 The sight of which made a handful of passengers puke. 1254 01:20:10,635 --> 01:20:13,035 They had to turn the plane around. 1255 01:20:13,035 --> 01:20:16,249 Military jets were scrambled, I think because someone 1256 01:20:16,249 --> 01:20:19,902 shouted something out as a joke that was construed 1257 01:20:19,902 --> 01:20:22,955 as threatening, but that didn't for a moment 1258 01:20:22,955 --> 01:20:25,205 subdue the insane laughter. 1259 01:20:32,259 --> 01:20:36,471 That was the only time I thought I was crazy 1260 01:20:36,471 --> 01:20:39,304 to do what I'm doing, politically. 1261 01:20:41,139 --> 01:20:43,389 To try to change the world. 1262 01:20:44,912 --> 01:20:46,162 For the better. 1263 01:21:11,905 --> 01:21:15,869 I'm growing more accustomed to my new breasts. 1264 01:21:15,869 --> 01:21:19,294 I can touch them now without getting an inexplicably 1265 01:21:19,294 --> 01:21:21,211 sick feeling in my gut. 1266 01:21:25,188 --> 01:21:27,521 I've named them, my breasts. 1267 01:21:28,962 --> 01:21:31,212 (laughing) 1268 01:21:32,332 --> 01:21:36,520 Did I mention Nevada's dating a guy named Otto? 1269 01:21:36,520 --> 01:21:37,353 Otto. 1270 01:21:39,975 --> 01:21:41,058 Unbelievable. 1271 01:21:57,055 --> 01:22:00,222 - You really have a lot of pubic hair. 1272 01:22:01,709 --> 01:22:03,845 Do you ever shave it? 1273 01:22:03,845 --> 01:22:08,412 - Can't, it's one of the town's new regulations. 1274 01:22:08,412 --> 01:22:09,245 - Oh? 1275 01:22:10,095 --> 01:22:12,309 - I'm just fuckin' with you. 1276 01:22:12,309 --> 01:22:13,892 Does it bother you? 1277 01:22:14,789 --> 01:22:16,095 You want me to shave down there so you can fantasize 1278 01:22:16,095 --> 01:22:18,269 you're fucking a 10 year old girl? 1279 01:22:18,269 --> 01:22:22,372 - You're not gonna hit me again are you? 1280 01:22:22,372 --> 01:22:25,802 - I want to introduce you to my Grandma one of these days. 1281 01:22:25,802 --> 01:22:30,229 I'm gonna meet her at the archery range on Thursday. 1282 01:22:30,229 --> 01:22:31,979 I think she's lonely. 1283 01:22:32,949 --> 01:22:35,015 - She doesn't have a boyfriend? 1284 01:22:35,015 --> 01:22:36,655 - I wish. 1285 01:22:36,655 --> 01:22:38,488 She's single for life. 1286 01:22:39,869 --> 01:22:42,549 She did meet a guy on this dating site once, 1287 01:22:42,549 --> 01:22:45,135 he told her that he started crying at 60 1288 01:22:45,135 --> 01:22:47,218 and hadn't stopped since. 1289 01:22:49,306 --> 01:22:51,375 He was trying to impress her or something 1290 01:22:51,375 --> 01:22:54,789 with how sensitive he was or some such thing. 1291 01:22:54,789 --> 01:22:57,788 - Isn't Nevada Smith the name of a movie? 1292 01:22:57,788 --> 01:22:59,015 - A year. 1293 01:22:59,015 --> 01:23:01,935 It took you a full year to ask me that. 1294 01:23:01,935 --> 01:23:03,562 I knew you knowed that. 1295 01:23:03,562 --> 01:23:06,979 Yes, it is, but no, that's not it at all. 1296 01:23:09,304 --> 01:23:12,066 I was born on my mother's 35 birthday. 1297 01:23:12,066 --> 01:23:15,184 And Nevada is the 35th state. 1298 01:23:15,184 --> 01:23:17,351 She's patriotic like that. 1299 01:23:19,066 --> 01:23:22,412 - Your mom was only 22 when you were born. 1300 01:23:22,412 --> 01:23:25,495 - Man, I can't get anything past you. 1301 01:23:36,626 --> 01:23:37,709 Oh, good one. 1302 01:23:40,533 --> 01:23:42,283 - 'Kay, you watching? 1303 01:23:54,612 --> 01:23:56,933 Keep your eyes open. 1304 01:23:56,933 --> 01:24:00,766 Some of the archers around here rank amateurs. 1305 01:24:01,933 --> 01:24:03,880 - Keep your eyes open? 1306 01:24:03,880 --> 01:24:05,613 Is that a joke? 1307 01:24:05,613 --> 01:24:07,400 - You're so cute. 1308 01:24:07,400 --> 01:24:08,733 Here, like this. 1309 01:24:13,586 --> 01:24:14,669 Tight, tight. 1310 01:24:15,813 --> 01:24:19,466 I'm starting to worry about your old Grandma. 1311 01:24:19,466 --> 01:24:22,038 She's been going into the city regularly 1312 01:24:22,038 --> 01:24:26,706 and hopping on Chinatown buses headed for Atlantic City. 1313 01:24:26,706 --> 01:24:28,333 - Why are you doing that? 1314 01:24:28,333 --> 01:24:30,346 - I'll tell you, being a passenger on one of those 1315 01:24:30,346 --> 01:24:34,346 buses is more dangerous than one eye to archery. 1316 01:24:35,371 --> 01:24:39,204 A few months ago, I woke up, I couldn't sleep. 1317 01:24:40,293 --> 01:24:43,573 I watched Casablanca and I got all caught up 1318 01:24:43,573 --> 01:24:45,490 in the elicit gambling. 1319 01:24:46,546 --> 01:24:49,560 - Bogart turns you on, huh? 1320 01:24:49,560 --> 01:24:52,477 - I was more of a Claude Rains gal. 1321 01:24:53,839 --> 01:24:56,493 What are you reading these days? 1322 01:24:56,493 --> 01:24:59,826 - How do you know I have a book with me? 1323 01:25:02,346 --> 01:25:05,677 The Secret Life of a Lonely Doll. 1324 01:25:05,677 --> 01:25:09,906 And Robert Caro's second Johnson Biography. 1325 01:25:09,906 --> 01:25:13,226 I can't poop without taking a book in there with me. 1326 01:25:13,226 --> 01:25:16,809 I'm like a little boy being toilet trained. 1327 01:25:18,025 --> 01:25:21,213 Mom seldom leaves the house anymore. 1328 01:25:21,213 --> 01:25:23,133 - Seems like just yesterday we couldn't get her 1329 01:25:23,133 --> 01:25:24,716 out of the library. 1330 01:25:26,496 --> 01:25:30,240 You're worried about her, aren't you? 1331 01:25:30,240 --> 01:25:31,573 You know, honey, 1332 01:25:33,066 --> 01:25:35,773 when I was in high school 100 years ago, 1333 01:25:35,773 --> 01:25:39,940 my best male friend was a member of the varsity tennis team. 1334 01:25:41,533 --> 01:25:44,280 He was the friendliest guy in the world 1335 01:25:44,280 --> 01:25:47,919 and he had lofty, spunky dreams, too. 1336 01:25:47,919 --> 01:25:50,336 But the pressure took a toll. 1337 01:25:52,600 --> 01:25:55,226 He became an alcoholic. 1338 01:25:55,226 --> 01:25:59,760 He developed psorosis, his stomach became distended. 1339 01:25:59,760 --> 01:26:03,760 His hair turned white, it seemed like overnight. 1340 01:26:04,613 --> 01:26:06,196 He became a hermit. 1341 01:26:07,680 --> 01:26:11,847 It was his vanity, not his illness that singed his dreams. 1342 01:26:13,893 --> 01:26:15,825 - Did you ever tell mom about that? 1343 01:26:15,825 --> 01:26:17,346 - Did you ever tell your boyfriend that your 1344 01:26:17,346 --> 01:26:19,466 grandmother was famous? 1345 01:26:19,466 --> 01:26:21,640 - Why because your father was one of 1346 01:26:21,640 --> 01:26:23,425 Hitler's 100 bodyguards? 1347 01:26:23,425 --> 01:26:24,675 - Fame is fame. 1348 01:26:25,880 --> 01:26:28,146 Before Andy Warhol made everybody famous, 1349 01:26:28,146 --> 01:26:30,063 there was Adolf Hitler. 1350 01:26:31,706 --> 01:26:34,333 - I would never tell him that. 1351 01:26:34,333 --> 01:26:37,944 - You're afraid he would spook easily, huh? 1352 01:26:37,944 --> 01:26:41,733 Fear runs in your family, (mumbles). 1353 01:26:41,733 --> 01:26:44,960 I used to be afraid of being pierced by an arrow. 1354 01:26:44,960 --> 01:26:48,213 Your mother is still afraid of failure. 1355 01:26:48,213 --> 01:26:51,130 You can't stand the sight of blood. 1356 01:26:52,173 --> 01:26:55,840 Yet here I am, your mother's a local legend. 1357 01:26:56,705 --> 01:27:00,280 And every month you still menstruate. 1358 01:27:00,280 --> 01:27:02,746 Your father's fearless. 1359 01:27:02,746 --> 01:27:04,892 That's why he's a good doctor. 1360 01:27:04,892 --> 01:27:06,746 That's why he's a good man. 1361 01:27:06,746 --> 01:27:07,579 Even now. 1362 01:27:08,626 --> 01:27:09,773 - I told Otto. 1363 01:27:09,773 --> 01:27:10,613 - Otto? 1364 01:27:10,613 --> 01:27:13,386 - I know, but it grows on you. 1365 01:27:13,386 --> 01:27:14,943 I told him how you love archery 1366 01:27:14,943 --> 01:27:16,400 and how you lost your eye. 1367 01:27:16,400 --> 01:27:18,746 - Oh, I wish you hadn't done that. 1368 01:27:18,746 --> 01:27:20,496 - I'm sorry, Grandma. 1369 01:27:21,381 --> 01:27:22,214 Why? 1370 01:27:24,808 --> 01:27:26,641 - Listen, honey, okay. 1371 01:27:28,316 --> 01:27:32,233 When I, I was boy crazy when I was in the army. 1372 01:27:33,583 --> 01:27:36,940 I was particularly smitten with this one boy, 1373 01:27:36,940 --> 01:27:38,023 this one man. 1374 01:27:39,606 --> 01:27:41,513 He knew my whole story. 1375 01:27:41,513 --> 01:27:43,486 But he wouldn't go out with me. 1376 01:27:43,486 --> 01:27:44,986 Only with Jewises. 1377 01:27:47,113 --> 01:27:50,913 But I couldn't stop daydreaming about him, spying on him. 1378 01:27:50,913 --> 01:27:53,433 One day I was watching him across the barracks 1379 01:27:53,433 --> 01:27:56,595 from my window, I wasn't thinking. 1380 01:27:56,595 --> 01:28:00,262 My reflexes were dulled by my sexual desire. 1381 01:28:01,127 --> 01:28:04,008 The double hung window overhead, 1382 01:28:04,008 --> 01:28:08,473 suddenly dropped like a guillotine onto my head. 1383 01:28:08,473 --> 01:28:11,781 Instantly, I lost the sight in my eye. 1384 01:28:11,781 --> 01:28:14,260 That's why I'm blind in one eye. 1385 01:28:14,260 --> 01:28:16,343 - You lied to me Grandma. 1386 01:28:18,261 --> 01:28:20,515 - We each have one thing that's difficult 1387 01:28:20,515 --> 01:28:22,182 to own up to, right? 1388 01:28:24,168 --> 01:28:27,248 I was shipped home to Germany immediately, 1389 01:28:27,248 --> 01:28:29,248 my tail between my legs. 1390 01:28:31,568 --> 01:28:34,635 But it was because of my blindness that I met Grandpa. 1391 01:28:34,635 --> 01:28:36,164 - How did you meet Grandpa? 1392 01:28:36,164 --> 01:28:38,414 - He saved my life, he did. 1393 01:28:41,875 --> 01:28:44,795 I was rushing to the post office to mail a Dear John 1394 01:28:44,795 --> 01:28:47,628 letter to that same guy in Israel. 1395 01:28:49,101 --> 01:28:52,646 But because my peripheral vision was compromised, 1396 01:28:52,646 --> 01:28:55,578 and I hadn't quite adjusted to it yet, 1397 01:28:55,578 --> 01:28:57,766 I still can't believe it. 1398 01:28:57,766 --> 01:29:00,604 I ran directly into the path of a streetcar, 1399 01:29:00,604 --> 01:29:04,821 but the last second, a stranger shoved me out of the way. 1400 01:29:04,821 --> 01:29:07,206 He took me to a nearby doctor. 1401 01:29:07,206 --> 01:29:08,706 My arm was broken. 1402 01:29:11,635 --> 01:29:14,135 Afterwards he said I owed him. 1403 01:29:16,728 --> 01:29:19,781 When I asked him, you know what form of payment that would 1404 01:29:19,781 --> 01:29:22,614 take, he said my hand in marriage. 1405 01:29:24,179 --> 01:29:28,513 I figured he was right, I owed him, so I said yes. 1406 01:29:28,513 --> 01:29:30,659 How short-sighted was that? 1407 01:29:30,659 --> 01:29:32,368 - Was Grandpa handsome back then? 1408 01:29:32,368 --> 01:29:33,201 - Nah. 1409 01:29:33,201 --> 01:29:35,021 (laughing) 1410 01:29:35,021 --> 01:29:39,075 He didn't develop good looks until he turned 50. 1411 01:29:39,075 --> 01:29:41,178 - What a fucking story. 1412 01:29:41,178 --> 01:29:43,141 Why did you think it was short-sighted of you? 1413 01:29:43,141 --> 01:29:46,276 - Because there might have been someone better out there. 1414 01:29:46,276 --> 01:29:49,276 For me, someone better than Grandpa. 1415 01:29:50,128 --> 01:29:54,355 And I rushed into marriage just because I owed him my life. 1416 01:29:54,355 --> 01:29:56,927 - Grandma, shame on you. 1417 01:29:56,927 --> 01:29:58,260 I loved Grandpa. 1418 01:29:59,285 --> 01:30:00,755 I loved his candy store. 1419 01:30:00,755 --> 01:30:03,274 - He opened that candy store when I got pregnant 1420 01:30:03,274 --> 01:30:04,691 with your mother. 1421 01:30:05,821 --> 01:30:07,755 He thought a child would love its father that 1422 01:30:07,755 --> 01:30:11,421 much more if he owned a candy store. 1423 01:30:11,421 --> 01:30:14,315 Especially since he was so ugly and all, 1424 01:30:14,315 --> 01:30:16,398 and so undeserving of me. 1425 01:30:18,728 --> 01:30:21,648 Honey, buying love is a sin, 1426 01:30:21,648 --> 01:30:23,815 especially a child's love. 1427 01:30:24,701 --> 01:30:27,118 - Grandma, shut up right now. 1428 01:30:28,501 --> 01:30:30,965 You remember those promotional storybook-shaped 1429 01:30:30,965 --> 01:30:33,835 Life-Saver boxes that he used to give us at Christmas? 1430 01:30:33,835 --> 01:30:37,395 - Well, Bubbala, I'm fresh out of Life-Savers. 1431 01:30:37,395 --> 01:30:38,228 What's up? 1432 01:30:39,435 --> 01:30:42,781 I'm gonna die soon, I don't have time to waste. 1433 01:30:42,781 --> 01:30:44,608 - You've been using that line on me for over 1434 01:30:44,608 --> 01:30:48,805 10 years, it doesn't motivate me anymore. 1435 01:30:48,805 --> 01:30:51,275 Or scare me anymore. 1436 01:30:51,275 --> 01:30:52,108 Damn. 1437 01:30:53,021 --> 01:30:54,854 It's about me and mom. 1438 01:30:55,806 --> 01:30:57,556 Something's going on. 1439 01:30:58,875 --> 01:31:00,708 Mom stares at me, now. 1440 01:31:02,781 --> 01:31:06,941 Since the operation, specifically at my breasts. 1441 01:31:06,941 --> 01:31:09,115 I started walking around the house topless, 1442 01:31:09,115 --> 01:31:10,858 so it would be therapeutic for her, 1443 01:31:10,858 --> 01:31:15,025 but now I avoid her all together whenever possible. 1444 01:31:17,155 --> 01:31:19,155 I avoid both my parents. 1445 01:31:20,594 --> 01:31:22,421 And they're amazing people. 1446 01:31:22,421 --> 01:31:23,860 They're amazing parents. 1447 01:31:23,860 --> 01:31:25,693 It's, it's killing me. 1448 01:31:27,808 --> 01:31:30,648 - Weren't you always proud of your body? 1449 01:31:30,648 --> 01:31:32,728 Didn't she always look at your breasts? 1450 01:31:32,728 --> 01:31:34,328 - It was different before. 1451 01:31:34,328 --> 01:31:36,768 I was going through puberty then. 1452 01:31:36,768 --> 01:31:39,661 She's not objectifying me though. 1453 01:31:39,661 --> 01:31:40,828 I don't think. 1454 01:31:43,620 --> 01:31:46,541 I don't know what's going on, Grandma. 1455 01:31:46,541 --> 01:31:48,595 - What do you want me to say? 1456 01:31:48,595 --> 01:31:50,428 This is a catastrophe? 1457 01:31:51,301 --> 01:31:53,884 Losing an eye is a catastrophe. 1458 01:31:55,261 --> 01:31:57,995 My father always used to tell me, 1459 01:31:57,995 --> 01:32:01,528 don't worry so much, you'll live longer. 1460 01:32:01,528 --> 01:32:04,861 Old chestnut, but I think he was right. 1461 01:32:04,861 --> 01:32:07,021 - That guy at the barracks, 1462 01:32:07,021 --> 01:32:08,941 when you were ogling him, 1463 01:32:08,941 --> 01:32:10,941 were you looking through binoculars? 1464 01:32:10,941 --> 01:32:14,358 - Now wouldn't that have been ridiculous? 1465 01:32:15,995 --> 01:32:20,807 Nevada, I've been proud of my daughter every day 1466 01:32:20,807 --> 01:32:24,890 of her life, nothing's going to ever change that. 1467 01:32:26,858 --> 01:32:31,025 And I believe that what she's trying to do now is... 1468 01:32:34,445 --> 01:32:35,362 Okay, okay. 1469 01:32:37,618 --> 01:32:40,031 Let's go over there, to your house. 1470 01:32:40,031 --> 01:32:41,695 If she doesn't look at my breasts, 1471 01:32:41,695 --> 01:32:44,112 there's gonna be hell to pay. 1472 01:32:53,311 --> 01:32:56,561 (truck engine humming) 1473 01:33:28,548 --> 01:33:31,048 - Thank you for picking me up. 1474 01:33:39,725 --> 01:33:41,142 - You're welcome. 1475 01:33:58,965 --> 01:34:01,715 (birds chirping) 1476 01:34:48,748 --> 01:34:51,415 (clock ticking) 1477 01:35:14,813 --> 01:35:17,563 (zipper buzzing) 1478 01:35:24,068 --> 01:35:26,735 (clock ticking) 1479 01:35:51,894 --> 01:35:53,601 - Remember during our last session, 1480 01:35:53,601 --> 01:35:55,412 you told me that your mother didn't want to have 1481 01:35:55,412 --> 01:35:58,228 any more children after your sister died. 1482 01:35:58,228 --> 01:36:02,001 And that you decided then for the first time in your life 1483 01:36:02,001 --> 01:36:04,881 that you wanted to have children. 1484 01:36:04,881 --> 01:36:08,975 For your mother, to replace what she lost. 1485 01:36:08,975 --> 01:36:10,142 - So what now? 1486 01:36:11,428 --> 01:36:15,668 - Some people, all over the world, believe in idealism. 1487 01:36:15,668 --> 01:36:17,501 They have lofty goals. 1488 01:36:18,895 --> 01:36:23,201 Improbable ideals, they aspire to be good, 1489 01:36:23,201 --> 01:36:25,171 altruistic people. 1490 01:36:25,171 --> 01:36:27,878 - Gandhi, Mother Teresa. 1491 01:36:27,878 --> 01:36:30,731 - Two out of what, six, seven billion? 1492 01:36:30,731 --> 01:36:32,945 You have better odds playing the lottery. 1493 01:36:32,945 --> 01:36:35,518 For most people, they don't feel the need to set 1494 01:36:35,518 --> 01:36:36,935 impossible goals. 1495 01:36:38,463 --> 01:36:40,380 For them, shit happens. 1496 01:36:41,478 --> 01:36:42,811 It just happens. 1497 01:36:44,064 --> 01:36:46,665 - Mom anticipates calamity so well. 1498 01:36:46,665 --> 01:36:48,582 She just swats it away. 1499 01:36:50,315 --> 01:36:52,478 It's still a boat load of pressure though. 1500 01:36:52,478 --> 01:36:56,914 - Some people respond to pressure in extraordinary fashion. 1501 01:36:56,914 --> 01:36:57,997 - Ironically. 1502 01:38:02,158 --> 01:38:02,991 - Oh my. 1503 01:38:27,719 --> 01:38:29,219 You are so lovely. 1504 01:38:38,106 --> 01:38:40,856 (birds chirping) 1505 01:38:57,066 --> 01:38:57,899 - Birds. 1506 01:39:01,986 --> 01:39:03,486 - Beautiful birds. 1507 01:39:05,222 --> 01:39:08,722 They're lovely and simple to take care of. 1508 01:39:10,476 --> 01:39:11,809 - Simply lovely. 1509 01:39:13,996 --> 01:39:15,329 - Simply lovely. 1510 01:39:16,849 --> 01:39:18,569 I like that. 1511 01:39:18,569 --> 01:39:21,319 (birds chirping) 1512 01:39:33,876 --> 01:39:38,088 - The night Amy died, the four of us had dinner together. 1513 01:39:38,088 --> 01:39:39,255 The survivors. 1514 01:39:40,889 --> 01:39:43,315 I asked if we could go out for ice cream, 1515 01:39:43,315 --> 01:39:46,956 and my father asked why, and I reminded him 1516 01:39:46,956 --> 01:39:48,912 that the tooth fairy showed up right on time 1517 01:39:48,912 --> 01:39:50,436 after I lost my first tooth, 1518 01:39:50,436 --> 01:39:51,702 and that this was much more-- 1519 01:39:51,702 --> 01:39:52,702 - Traumatic. 1520 01:39:56,662 --> 01:39:58,482 - And I said to my Mother, 1521 01:39:58,482 --> 01:40:02,447 don't let the tooth fairy put you to shame. 1522 01:40:02,447 --> 01:40:04,364 Or something like that. 1523 01:40:06,942 --> 01:40:08,487 - One of the first things they made me do, 1524 01:40:08,487 --> 01:40:12,487 after I was arrested, was surrender my passport. 1525 01:40:14,956 --> 01:40:16,956 My passport surrendered. 1526 01:40:18,876 --> 01:40:20,959 Sounds queer, doesn't it? 1527 01:40:23,742 --> 01:40:27,492 Your mother and I really did love each other. 1528 01:40:29,396 --> 01:40:31,979 There's a building in New York. 1529 01:40:34,464 --> 01:40:38,464 Skyscraper on Park Avenue, the MetLife Building. 1530 01:40:39,344 --> 01:40:42,104 It was once known as the Pan Am Building. 1531 01:40:42,104 --> 01:40:44,357 Pan Am was once the most famous international airline 1532 01:40:44,357 --> 01:40:48,524 around, it was even the airline of the future in 2001. 1533 01:40:49,557 --> 01:40:50,984 Did you ever see that movie? 1534 01:40:50,984 --> 01:40:52,484 - Was it in color? 1535 01:40:53,891 --> 01:40:54,724 Kidding. 1536 01:40:58,797 --> 01:41:02,371 - Airlines used to have their own stores, kiosks. 1537 01:41:02,371 --> 01:41:06,036 All over town, in every major town. 1538 01:41:06,036 --> 01:41:07,771 There was one on the ground floor of that building 1539 01:41:07,771 --> 01:41:09,354 on that skyscraper. 1540 01:41:10,889 --> 01:41:12,639 Their flagship store. 1541 01:41:14,344 --> 01:41:17,397 All of the sales people used to wear 1542 01:41:17,397 --> 01:41:19,564 flight attendant uniforms. 1543 01:41:20,421 --> 01:41:22,004 It was so romantic. 1544 01:41:23,771 --> 01:41:24,604 So grand. 1545 01:41:29,304 --> 01:41:33,437 The day I knew we were in love for certain, 1546 01:41:33,437 --> 01:41:36,131 your mother and I, was the day we received 1547 01:41:36,131 --> 01:41:37,798 our first passports. 1548 01:41:39,757 --> 01:41:43,590 What pride we felt being citizens of the world. 1549 01:41:43,590 --> 01:41:45,957 We practically sprinted to that airline ticket office 1550 01:41:45,957 --> 01:41:47,957 to buy tickets to Paris. 1551 01:41:49,543 --> 01:41:51,543 Our first overseas trip. 1552 01:41:53,331 --> 01:41:56,744 - Maybe you didn't love mom, maybe you just loved 2001 1553 01:41:56,744 --> 01:41:57,661 and Pan Am. 1554 01:42:00,157 --> 01:42:01,990 - Maybe yes, maybe no. 1555 01:42:06,784 --> 01:42:09,609 - The night Amy died I was at a friend's house, 1556 01:42:09,609 --> 01:42:10,859 on a play date. 1557 01:42:12,224 --> 01:42:14,556 And the phone rang and she answered the phone, 1558 01:42:14,556 --> 01:42:15,639 and listened, 1559 01:42:17,331 --> 01:42:20,081 and then my friend said she died. 1560 01:42:22,997 --> 01:42:26,330 For a few moments, I was shaking so hard 1561 01:42:28,731 --> 01:42:30,481 it felt like forever. 1562 01:42:33,225 --> 01:42:35,475 I thought that she was mom, 1563 01:42:36,944 --> 01:42:41,111 and it was all my little sister's fault that mom died. 1564 01:42:42,037 --> 01:42:46,204 And I was so relieved to find out that it wasn't mom. 1565 01:42:47,647 --> 01:42:48,980 But I loved Amy. 1566 01:42:51,557 --> 01:42:53,057 I loved my sister. 1567 01:42:57,317 --> 01:43:00,400 Hating yourself takes so much energy. 1568 01:43:02,437 --> 01:43:04,437 - [Doctor] What was prison like for you? 1569 01:43:04,437 --> 01:43:05,984 - What? 1570 01:43:05,984 --> 01:43:07,144 - Your father being in prison. 1571 01:43:07,144 --> 01:43:10,311 What was that experience like for you? 1572 01:43:11,704 --> 01:43:12,954 - Like nothing. 1573 01:43:15,397 --> 01:43:17,147 Like taking a shower. 1574 01:43:18,316 --> 01:43:20,264 Something you do every day without thinking about it 1575 01:43:20,264 --> 01:43:22,264 or remembering it later. 1576 01:43:24,811 --> 01:43:26,394 Wait, once one day, 1577 01:43:29,731 --> 01:43:33,898 I thought about when my parents went on a six week vacation. 1578 01:43:34,851 --> 01:43:36,277 I thought about how happy I would be 1579 01:43:36,277 --> 01:43:38,360 when my father came home. 1580 01:43:41,011 --> 01:43:45,767 I became more excited, almost giddy, every day leading 1581 01:43:45,767 --> 01:43:47,184 up to his return. 1582 01:43:49,632 --> 01:43:53,525 - [Doctor] Did you feel equally giddy about the prospect 1583 01:43:53,525 --> 01:43:55,192 of seeing him again? 1584 01:43:58,085 --> 01:43:59,252 - [Nevada] No. 1585 01:44:00,421 --> 01:44:01,671 - [Doctor] Why? 1586 01:44:04,167 --> 01:44:08,334 - Because I suppose this time I knew he'd be back. 1587 01:44:20,087 --> 01:44:21,754 I spent hours, days, 1588 01:44:24,954 --> 01:44:28,073 weeks of my life in slow motion bashing a tennis ball 1589 01:44:28,073 --> 01:44:29,323 against a wall. 1590 01:44:32,234 --> 01:44:35,047 I wanted to be the best at everything. 1591 01:44:35,047 --> 01:44:36,487 - Everybody does, honey. 1592 01:44:36,487 --> 01:44:39,581 - Yeah, but everybody settles. 1593 01:44:39,581 --> 01:44:41,414 My mom doesn't settle. 1594 01:44:42,554 --> 01:44:44,804 (laughing) 1595 01:44:47,607 --> 01:44:50,514 - [Judith] What's wrong with the name Otto? 1596 01:44:50,514 --> 01:44:52,597 - I love him, but really. 1597 01:44:55,367 --> 01:44:57,514 - [Judith] My first boyfriend at sleep away camp, 1598 01:44:57,514 --> 01:44:58,725 you probably don't remember this, 1599 01:44:58,725 --> 01:45:00,558 but his name was Buck. 1600 01:45:02,421 --> 01:45:04,607 Everyone made fun of him for his name, 1601 01:45:04,607 --> 01:45:08,701 but I told him that it sounded like a superhero 1602 01:45:08,701 --> 01:45:10,834 in a comic book. 1603 01:45:10,834 --> 01:45:15,001 So, he decided he'd actually write a superhero named Buck 1604 01:45:17,021 --> 01:45:20,521 at camp, and he made me a character in it. 1605 01:45:23,389 --> 01:45:27,434 I thought my heart was gonna pound right out of my chest. 1606 01:45:27,434 --> 01:45:29,621 - What was your character's name? 1607 01:45:29,621 --> 01:45:31,285 - Judith. 1608 01:45:31,285 --> 01:45:33,535 (laughing) 1609 01:45:34,647 --> 01:45:38,480 We made out, he was my first make out session. 1610 01:45:40,957 --> 01:45:43,741 And these older kids beat him up one day. 1611 01:45:43,741 --> 01:45:47,908 Not too bad, just cuts and scratches, bruised ego. 1612 01:45:50,287 --> 01:45:52,581 And I nursed him back to health. 1613 01:45:52,581 --> 01:45:54,245 We played doctor. 1614 01:45:54,245 --> 01:45:56,221 But you know, real doctor. 1615 01:45:56,221 --> 01:45:58,434 You have the best name. 1616 01:45:58,434 --> 01:46:01,517 I was always so jealous of your name. 1617 01:46:02,390 --> 01:46:03,223 - Judith, 1618 01:46:04,607 --> 01:46:05,857 Nevada and Amy. 1619 01:46:09,059 --> 01:46:10,140 - It's getting really cold here. 1620 01:46:10,140 --> 01:46:11,687 I went to this flea market last week, 1621 01:46:11,687 --> 01:46:13,604 you know what I bought? 1622 01:46:14,794 --> 01:46:17,044 This Boston Red Sox jacket. 1623 01:46:18,087 --> 01:46:19,504 - Oh, cool beans. 1624 01:46:23,061 --> 01:46:26,581 Dad once told me that everyone's life has at least 1625 01:46:26,581 --> 01:46:28,331 one good movie in it. 1626 01:46:29,899 --> 01:46:30,732 Not mine. 1627 01:46:32,979 --> 01:46:37,474 Good movie is one that you can identify with. 1628 01:46:37,474 --> 01:46:41,224 I don't think anybody can identify with mine. 1629 01:46:42,218 --> 01:46:44,141 And I can't figure out if that's a good thing 1630 01:46:44,141 --> 01:46:45,224 or bad thing. 1631 01:46:46,941 --> 01:46:50,181 - Hmm, making a movie about one's life is like 1632 01:46:50,181 --> 01:46:52,487 living in the past. 1633 01:46:52,487 --> 01:46:54,341 You've always lived in the present, 1634 01:46:54,341 --> 01:46:56,424 that's where your fun is. 1635 01:46:58,754 --> 01:47:02,086 - I like to live in the future. 1636 01:47:02,086 --> 01:47:04,669 It's so endlessly curious, and, 1637 01:47:06,019 --> 01:47:08,083 most people don't want to rush time. 1638 01:47:08,083 --> 01:47:09,500 Me, I can't wait. 1639 01:47:15,139 --> 01:47:16,965 Jude, you know what I realized? 1640 01:47:16,965 --> 01:47:18,215 - What, Nevada? 1641 01:47:19,351 --> 01:47:22,618 - Since you were born October 10th, 1642 01:47:22,618 --> 01:47:27,163 you were probably the product of a drug fueled, 1643 01:47:27,163 --> 01:47:29,580 drunken, New Year's Eve orgy. 1644 01:47:30,778 --> 01:47:32,033 - [Judith] Oh God. 1645 01:47:32,033 --> 01:47:33,299 - Do the math. 1646 01:47:33,299 --> 01:47:36,553 'Cause first borns are usually late, 1647 01:47:36,553 --> 01:47:38,446 and you were Mom's first. 1648 01:47:38,446 --> 01:47:42,613 And you were due either September 30th or October 1st. 1649 01:47:44,950 --> 01:47:46,283 So Mom was late. 1650 01:47:48,084 --> 01:47:50,001 And you know what else? 1651 01:47:50,939 --> 01:47:54,179 She probably held you in a couple of extra days. 1652 01:47:54,179 --> 01:47:56,929 So your birthday would be 10, 10. 1653 01:47:57,913 --> 01:47:59,246 So it would be easier for everyone 1654 01:47:59,246 --> 01:48:01,413 to remember your birthday. 1655 01:48:03,686 --> 01:48:07,853 That's how much Mom loved you before you were even born. 1656 01:48:11,391 --> 01:48:14,873 Jude, I'm sorry I forgot your birthday this year. 1657 01:48:14,873 --> 01:48:19,040 - You always forget my birthday (chuckles). 1658 01:48:23,765 --> 01:48:25,682 Is Mom losing her mind? 1659 01:48:26,566 --> 01:48:29,233 All the surgeries, the politics? 1660 01:48:31,179 --> 01:48:34,679 - Grandma made me watch this German movie. 1661 01:48:35,576 --> 01:48:38,743 It's called Even Dwarfs Started Small. 1662 01:48:41,073 --> 01:48:41,990 Mom's fine. 1663 01:48:45,859 --> 01:48:46,776 She's fine. 1664 01:48:50,526 --> 01:48:53,943 I am so tired, but I love talking to you. 1665 01:48:56,685 --> 01:48:57,518 - Me too. 1666 01:48:58,856 --> 01:49:01,856 I'll stay here till you fall asleep. 1667 01:49:06,873 --> 01:49:11,040 - The single most painful thing about this whole debacle, 1668 01:49:11,990 --> 01:49:15,113 I was stripped of my license whenever I was released 1669 01:49:15,113 --> 01:49:18,139 I was forbidden to practice dentistry ever again, 1670 01:49:18,139 --> 01:49:20,376 to take care of children. 1671 01:49:20,376 --> 01:49:24,019 I needed to conjure up something else to do with my hands. 1672 01:49:24,019 --> 01:49:24,852 My head. 1673 01:49:27,553 --> 01:49:30,859 You miss what's most familiar to you with your sense 1674 01:49:30,859 --> 01:49:33,993 of touch, more than sight and sound. 1675 01:49:33,993 --> 01:49:36,006 Since memory takes care of everything else. 1676 01:49:36,006 --> 01:49:37,173 But not touch. 1677 01:49:39,326 --> 01:49:42,658 Most days, most nights and the weather, 1678 01:49:42,658 --> 01:49:44,939 you don't care about the weather anymore. 1679 01:49:44,939 --> 01:49:48,739 It's remarkable, the attention, worry, life planning, 1680 01:49:48,739 --> 01:49:51,164 we're all guilty of it, in anticipation of certain 1681 01:49:51,164 --> 01:49:52,581 kinds of weather. 1682 01:49:54,485 --> 01:49:57,790 Weather should not dictate what we do on a quotidian basis. 1683 01:49:57,790 --> 01:50:00,373 It's a grotesque waste of life. 1684 01:50:02,699 --> 01:50:05,859 They wouldn't even let me practice dentistry in prison 1685 01:50:05,859 --> 01:50:08,057 because I'd been stripped of my license. 1686 01:50:08,057 --> 01:50:09,640 So I needed a plan. 1687 01:50:10,886 --> 01:50:13,233 I hadn't read all of the classic books when I was 1688 01:50:13,233 --> 01:50:16,859 in school, and had all the time in the world to read them. 1689 01:50:16,859 --> 01:50:19,609 What did I do with all that time? 1690 01:50:21,006 --> 01:50:23,673 Do we all take time for granted? 1691 01:50:25,219 --> 01:50:27,846 For a few days I began to think of prison 1692 01:50:27,846 --> 01:50:31,846 as a gift, rationalization number one. 1693 01:50:31,846 --> 01:50:35,192 So I read books a lot, and I worked out a lot. 1694 01:50:35,192 --> 01:50:38,739 But the books just fired up my imagination. 1695 01:50:38,739 --> 01:50:41,033 And the workouts kicked up pheromones 1696 01:50:41,033 --> 01:50:43,726 and all that did was ignite my testosterone. 1697 01:50:43,726 --> 01:50:47,893 Most powerful, most evil drug in the world, testosterone. 1698 01:50:49,713 --> 01:50:52,619 The idea of sex with a man was not an option, 1699 01:50:52,619 --> 01:50:55,452 so I became a chronic masturbater. 1700 01:50:56,593 --> 01:51:00,339 So I stopped reading books and I stopped going to the gym. 1701 01:51:00,339 --> 01:51:02,712 But, after a few months I thought I hadn't been 1702 01:51:02,712 --> 01:51:06,553 rehabilitated enough, or sufficiently punished, 1703 01:51:06,553 --> 01:51:09,193 and those feelings deprived me of sleep. 1704 01:51:09,193 --> 01:51:12,433 For four days straight I didn't sleep. 1705 01:51:12,433 --> 01:51:15,818 On the fifth day, I masturbated someone else. 1706 01:51:15,818 --> 01:51:18,086 More sleep deprivation. 1707 01:51:18,086 --> 01:51:19,086 Is that sex? 1708 01:51:21,099 --> 01:51:22,516 I don't think so. 1709 01:51:26,139 --> 01:51:29,816 I began making deals with God if I was the bottom 1710 01:51:29,816 --> 01:51:33,776 for just one other inmate, then maybe he, God, 1711 01:51:33,776 --> 01:51:35,618 would let me sleep again. 1712 01:51:35,618 --> 01:51:38,177 Rationalization number two. 1713 01:51:38,177 --> 01:51:40,686 I began finger fucking myself during masturbation 1714 01:51:40,686 --> 01:51:43,273 to get inured to the pain, to the prospect of pain, 1715 01:51:43,273 --> 01:51:44,793 but instead it felt great. 1716 01:51:44,793 --> 01:51:45,960 What the fuck? 1717 01:51:48,019 --> 01:51:50,150 I'm an old man now so no one needed me on the inside 1718 01:51:50,150 --> 01:51:51,806 or wanted me on the outside. 1719 01:51:51,806 --> 01:51:54,365 Everyone had their own distractions. 1720 01:51:54,365 --> 01:51:57,313 You know I didn't see much rape. 1721 01:51:57,313 --> 01:52:00,393 Instead, inmates would conduct these whacking off 1722 01:52:00,393 --> 01:52:04,206 contests to see who could ejaculate the farthest. 1723 01:52:04,206 --> 01:52:06,673 Prizes included cigarettes, free tattoos, 1724 01:52:06,673 --> 01:52:09,326 extra conjugal visits. 1725 01:52:09,326 --> 01:52:13,159 Yes, the guards liked to get in on the action. 1726 01:52:13,993 --> 01:52:18,926 Well, I don't smoke and the needles reminded me of Nevada 1727 01:52:18,926 --> 01:52:23,009 and her fear of blood, and extra conjugal visits, 1728 01:52:27,553 --> 01:52:30,553 well, that was the first six months. 1729 01:52:33,953 --> 01:52:36,966 Then they made me work, they made me take a job. 1730 01:52:36,966 --> 01:52:40,726 I was planning to retire before all of this happened. 1731 01:52:40,726 --> 01:52:42,893 But now, I'm not finished. 1732 01:52:45,004 --> 01:52:46,539 I feel incomplete. 1733 01:52:46,539 --> 01:52:48,539 I will never retire now. 1734 01:52:50,033 --> 01:52:51,499 But I needed a new trade. 1735 01:52:51,499 --> 01:52:54,913 My dentistry years were over, so I learned to repair 1736 01:52:54,913 --> 01:52:56,246 bikes in prison. 1737 01:52:58,446 --> 01:53:00,579 For six months or so, I worked exclusively with the 1738 01:53:00,579 --> 01:53:03,646 guards and the warden, they moved around the grounds 1739 01:53:03,646 --> 01:53:06,353 on bikes, and then I was granted permission, I 1740 01:53:06,353 --> 01:53:10,206 and half a dozen other inmates, to build a bike path. 1741 01:53:10,206 --> 01:53:13,873 A lane to requisition bikes for the inmates. 1742 01:53:16,793 --> 01:53:20,753 But I would have a new skill that would allow me 1743 01:53:20,753 --> 01:53:24,193 to get a job, that would allow me to continue to live 1744 01:53:24,193 --> 01:53:26,943 in Iris Glen after I was paroled. 1745 01:53:31,699 --> 01:53:32,532 Bikes. 1746 01:53:37,179 --> 01:53:38,179 I love kids. 1747 01:53:41,806 --> 01:53:42,639 Nevada, 1748 01:53:44,806 --> 01:53:45,723 I love you. 1749 01:53:49,778 --> 01:53:50,778 - I'm tired. 1750 01:53:52,273 --> 01:53:53,690 I'm going to bed. 1751 01:53:59,113 --> 01:53:59,946 - Me too. 1752 01:54:05,083 --> 01:54:07,583 - Yeah, I'm going to bed, too. 1753 01:54:27,113 --> 01:54:31,139 What was it that first attracted you to Harper? 1754 01:54:31,139 --> 01:54:34,911 - She was the most beautiful thing I ever saw. 1755 01:54:34,911 --> 01:54:38,686 Isn't that what first attracted you to Nevada? 1756 01:54:38,686 --> 01:54:42,457 - And was that also what Harper found attractive about you? 1757 01:54:42,457 --> 01:54:43,446 - Are you kidding me? 1758 01:54:43,446 --> 01:54:45,363 No, it was my ambition. 1759 01:54:46,699 --> 01:54:50,526 That was the biggest turn on for her, still is, I suppose. 1760 01:54:50,526 --> 01:54:52,497 It wasn't the money that went with the ambition, 1761 01:54:52,497 --> 01:54:55,513 it was something more intangible. 1762 01:54:55,513 --> 01:54:56,596 More sincere. 1763 01:54:59,539 --> 01:55:02,057 I was the youngest paid department store Santa 1764 01:55:02,057 --> 01:55:03,724 in recorded history. 1765 01:55:04,977 --> 01:55:08,018 One December, I cut school, rode my bike to the local 1766 01:55:08,018 --> 01:55:12,073 mall and I saw that Santa had called in sick. 1767 01:55:12,073 --> 01:55:14,499 So I tracked down this woman, this very pretty woman 1768 01:55:14,499 --> 01:55:17,139 who worked at the mall's HR department. 1769 01:55:17,139 --> 01:55:20,379 And I convinced her to let me stand in. 1770 01:55:20,379 --> 01:55:22,753 She was much older than I was. 1771 01:55:22,753 --> 01:55:24,836 But I made her look good. 1772 01:55:25,799 --> 01:55:27,566 - And the woman who hired you? 1773 01:55:27,566 --> 01:55:29,733 Older, probably all of 25? 1774 01:55:31,513 --> 01:55:33,605 Maybe she wanted to seduce you. 1775 01:55:33,605 --> 01:55:34,438 - No. 1776 01:55:40,097 --> 01:55:42,097 I never thought of that. 1777 01:55:43,033 --> 01:55:45,339 That's a possibility. 1778 01:55:45,339 --> 01:55:48,506 No, there was no sexual tension there. 1779 01:55:51,416 --> 01:55:52,499 I don't know. 1780 01:55:55,153 --> 01:55:58,403 Maybe I missed a wonderful opportunity. 1781 01:56:02,538 --> 01:56:03,788 - Probably not. 1782 01:56:12,710 --> 01:56:14,377 Good night, Richard. 1783 01:56:26,526 --> 01:56:28,776 Is Harper going to give up? 1784 01:56:30,685 --> 01:56:32,602 - Aside from the girls, 1785 01:56:34,560 --> 01:56:36,353 the happiest I've ever seen Harper was the day 1786 01:56:36,353 --> 01:56:39,851 she threw her hat into the ring at that movie theater. 1787 01:56:39,851 --> 01:56:41,601 She won't quit, ever. 1788 01:56:48,000 --> 01:56:49,833 - Good night, Richard. 1789 01:57:45,672 --> 01:57:46,505 My mother, 1790 01:57:49,232 --> 01:57:52,941 my mother was a school crossing guard. 1791 01:57:52,941 --> 01:57:54,608 Everybody loved her. 1792 01:57:55,581 --> 01:57:57,274 That's why I wasn't bullied. 1793 01:57:57,274 --> 01:57:59,524 (laughing) 1794 01:58:00,672 --> 01:58:02,418 She signed more senior yearbooks than even the 1795 01:58:02,418 --> 01:58:03,918 most popular kids. 1796 01:58:05,021 --> 01:58:08,438 Who else can say that about their mother? 1797 01:58:09,461 --> 01:58:13,044 - Why didn't she have more kids of her own? 1798 01:58:15,994 --> 01:58:18,994 - She thought that would be selfish. 1799 01:58:25,271 --> 01:58:26,521 Nevada, listen. 1800 01:58:27,473 --> 01:58:29,890 I need to ask you a question. 1801 01:58:31,954 --> 01:58:35,728 I wasn't available enough for my family 1802 01:58:35,728 --> 01:58:37,478 when my dad got sick. 1803 01:58:40,128 --> 01:58:44,181 I'm not going to let that happen with my mom. 1804 01:58:44,181 --> 01:58:48,434 She moved to Aberdeen, Scotland after my dad died. 1805 01:58:48,434 --> 01:58:52,184 My folks loved this movie with Burt Lancaster 1806 01:58:53,328 --> 01:58:56,661 about this quirky seaside Scottish town. 1807 01:58:57,608 --> 01:58:59,354 She always wanted to go there. 1808 01:58:59,354 --> 01:59:00,271 So she did. 1809 01:59:01,979 --> 01:59:05,396 But now there's a little bit of dementia. 1810 01:59:07,274 --> 01:59:10,607 You've always told me how tough you are. 1811 01:59:12,101 --> 01:59:15,848 I wanna move to Scotland to be near my mom. 1812 01:59:15,848 --> 01:59:18,431 And I want you to come with me. 1813 01:59:23,888 --> 01:59:26,221 - I'd like to meet your mom. 1814 01:59:31,286 --> 01:59:32,369 I don't know. 1815 01:59:34,914 --> 01:59:37,914 Scotland's awfully close to Ireland. 1816 01:59:47,848 --> 01:59:52,015 - One birthday I bought her streamers for her bike. 1817 01:59:55,034 --> 01:59:58,117 A bag of wooden clothes pins, decals, 1818 01:59:59,061 --> 02:00:01,061 a box of baseball cards. 1819 02:00:03,911 --> 02:00:07,061 That's how I decked out, that's how I pimped out 1820 02:00:07,061 --> 02:00:09,478 my own bike when I was a boy. 1821 02:00:11,392 --> 02:00:15,309 I couldn't imagine she'd have it any other way. 1822 02:00:16,781 --> 02:00:18,781 Oh, wooden clothes pins. 1823 02:00:21,181 --> 02:00:24,381 I even painted them her favorite color. 1824 02:00:24,381 --> 02:00:25,214 - Purple. 1825 02:00:26,994 --> 02:00:27,827 - Purple. 1826 02:00:29,834 --> 02:00:32,768 But it was her mom who helped her apply everything 1827 02:00:32,768 --> 02:00:34,435 to the bike, not me. 1828 02:00:36,248 --> 02:00:37,688 - Can I help? 1829 02:00:37,688 --> 02:00:40,498 - Sure, if you're mom says it's okay. 1830 02:00:40,498 --> 02:00:41,741 Is it okay? 1831 02:00:41,741 --> 02:00:42,574 - Mom? 1832 02:00:46,594 --> 02:00:47,427 - [Richard] What's your name? 1833 02:00:47,427 --> 02:00:48,301 - Ginny. 1834 02:00:48,301 --> 02:00:49,967 - Ginny, why don't you go pick out your favorite 1835 02:00:49,967 --> 02:00:51,672 color streamers from behind the counter and I'll 1836 02:00:51,672 --> 02:00:53,766 show you how to put 'em on your bike? 1837 02:00:53,766 --> 02:00:54,599 - Okay. 1838 02:01:01,364 --> 02:01:04,031 - What color were the streamers? 1839 02:01:09,528 --> 02:01:10,528 - Uh, white. 1840 02:01:16,754 --> 02:01:18,504 - You were a dentist. 1841 02:01:19,594 --> 02:01:21,594 She's very proud of you. 1842 02:01:23,713 --> 02:01:25,213 - I'm not so sure. 1843 02:01:29,501 --> 02:01:32,918 We're a family of very high expectations. 1844 02:01:52,114 --> 02:01:55,288 - [Harper] Mother, would you please get off of that thing? 1845 02:01:55,288 --> 02:01:56,927 - Where's Otto? 1846 02:01:56,927 --> 02:01:58,861 - Taking stock of his life. 1847 02:01:58,861 --> 02:02:00,528 He'll be right back. 1848 02:02:07,031 --> 02:02:09,864 You have a lot of work to do, Mom. 1849 02:02:10,808 --> 02:02:12,975 I'd only be a distraction. 1850 02:02:13,966 --> 02:02:16,049 It's only two more years. 1851 02:02:17,780 --> 02:02:20,034 Grandma's gonna take good care of you. 1852 02:02:20,034 --> 02:02:23,951 - Yeah, she'll probably shoot me with an arrow. 1853 02:02:26,901 --> 02:02:28,818 You're not coming back. 1854 02:02:30,674 --> 02:02:34,841 You're in love with Otto, Otto, what a stupid name. 1855 02:02:38,328 --> 02:02:42,621 And, you're going to fall in love with Ireland. 1856 02:02:42,621 --> 02:02:44,968 If your goal is to become a seductress when you're 1857 02:02:44,968 --> 02:02:47,901 a middle aged lady, you couldn't have a better teacher 1858 02:02:47,901 --> 02:02:48,984 than Ireland. 1859 02:02:55,421 --> 02:02:58,915 Once you're gone, Daddy has to go, too. 1860 02:02:58,915 --> 02:02:59,955 - Really? 1861 02:02:59,955 --> 02:03:01,021 - Yeah. 1862 02:03:01,021 --> 02:03:02,446 You wanna tell him? 1863 02:03:02,446 --> 02:03:03,779 I need a buffer. 1864 02:03:06,313 --> 02:03:07,980 He's not it anymore. 1865 02:03:09,966 --> 02:03:12,966 He'll be a distraction to the cause. 1866 02:03:18,635 --> 02:03:22,385 For the first time my girls will all be gone. 1867 02:03:23,315 --> 02:03:26,065 I'm so proud of all three of you. 1868 02:03:30,181 --> 02:03:34,348 Oh, I finally feel like that orphan we sometimes talk about. 1869 02:03:37,898 --> 02:03:39,938 The next time you come to visit, 1870 02:03:39,938 --> 02:03:43,325 you will have duel citizenship. 1871 02:03:43,325 --> 02:03:47,492 That is my personal private campaign pledge to you. 1872 02:03:51,576 --> 02:03:55,043 - Don't get yourself sick again, Mom. 1873 02:03:55,043 --> 02:03:59,210 - Don't go blind with all that stupid reading of yours. 1874 02:04:21,005 --> 02:04:22,418 - I'm gonna miss you, Grandma. 1875 02:04:22,418 --> 02:04:24,605 - You too, so much. 1876 02:04:24,605 --> 02:04:26,522 Take care of your eyes. 1877 02:04:27,818 --> 02:04:31,985 (applause) (cheering) 1878 02:04:36,855 --> 02:04:41,022 - My friends, Iris Glen is going to secede from the 1879 02:04:42,521 --> 02:04:45,255 United States of America! 1880 02:04:45,255 --> 02:04:49,422 (applause) (cheering) 1881 02:04:59,121 --> 02:05:03,204 I'm making it sound a lot easier than it will be. 1882 02:05:05,601 --> 02:05:08,055 And in six and a half years or so, 1883 02:05:08,055 --> 02:05:11,495 I hope my successor will grab the baton from me 1884 02:05:11,495 --> 02:05:15,308 and take the lead and work at it twice as hard 1885 02:05:15,308 --> 02:05:17,215 as I will to close the deal. 1886 02:05:17,215 --> 02:05:21,382 (applause) (cheering) 1887 02:05:23,468 --> 02:05:25,215 So let's put on a show! 1888 02:05:25,215 --> 02:05:29,382 (applause) (cheering) 1889 02:05:34,201 --> 02:05:37,268 Let's kick start something really dramatic, 1890 02:05:37,268 --> 02:05:40,055 something that gets rave reviews. 1891 02:05:40,055 --> 02:05:43,095 A hit show that spawns road companies 1892 02:05:43,095 --> 02:05:45,001 and goes global! 1893 02:05:45,001 --> 02:05:47,251 (applause) 1894 02:05:51,748 --> 02:05:54,628 Texas has a balanced budget, 1895 02:05:54,628 --> 02:05:57,015 we have a cash surplus. 1896 02:05:57,015 --> 02:05:58,892 (laughing) 1897 02:05:58,892 --> 02:06:02,548 Vermont has a flag, well ours will be prettier 1898 02:06:02,548 --> 02:06:04,048 and more enduring. 1899 02:06:07,495 --> 02:06:09,598 If I'm elected mayor in November, 1900 02:06:09,598 --> 02:06:13,431 I will have 2,190 days to get the ball rolling 1901 02:06:14,892 --> 02:06:17,695 and to find a worthy successor who will not only 1902 02:06:17,695 --> 02:06:19,413 make for a smooth transition, 1903 02:06:19,413 --> 02:06:23,548 but someone who will put our movement over the top. 1904 02:06:23,548 --> 02:06:27,715 (applause) (cheering) 1905 02:06:29,906 --> 02:06:32,406 These are not American ideals. 1906 02:06:34,575 --> 02:06:38,742 These are human ideals and I will not turn my back on them. 1907 02:06:41,268 --> 02:06:45,435 (applause) (cheering) 1908 02:07:20,758 --> 02:07:21,591 - Hi Jeff. 1909 02:07:21,591 --> 02:07:22,424 - Hi. 1910 02:07:59,238 --> 02:08:02,665 - [Man] God just 10 minutes inside that pussy. 1911 02:08:02,665 --> 02:08:05,998 (police sirens ringing)